


They're Sleeping

by moonqueen



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-01
Updated: 2016-09-01
Packaged: 2018-08-12 10:46:31
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 21,995
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7931698
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/moonqueen/pseuds/moonqueen
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Curiosity killed the cat, as they say.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Down the Road

**Author's Note:**

> Re-uploaded with permission from the original author.

Jongin missed Seoul, there was not one thing about Seoul he didn’t want to go back to. Sure, he liked the thought of having a bigger home; in general, the thought of living in a house instead of an apartment was very nice, but that didn’t keep him from feeling slightly put off by the lack of sound surrounding him.

His family (mum, dad, older brother Jonghun, Jongin himself) had just moved from the heart of Seoul to a rural village located what seemed like a million kilometres away from civilisation. To tell the sad truth, the location of their home wasn’t a part of the rural municipality, they lived a fifteen minute bus ride from the village, in a forest area consisting of only four houses, all located on the road Jongin now lived on as well.

There was quite a distance between each house, most of them had been used for farming in the past so the gardens were quite big, the one by Jongin’s house even had a small lake (a very pretty word to use, swamp would be more correct) and a grass field which made his father promise to buy a football net so they could get to spend some time outdoors.

There were a lot of arguments when his father had first revealed his wish to move to the countryside, especially Jonghun was not fond of the idea, “I only have one year of high school left!” he had angrily yelled, “can’t you move after I graduate?”

Their mother was very worried at that time too, the thought of finding a new job didn’t please her, but since the village wasn’t located more than a 40 minute ride from Busan his father insisted that it wouldn’t be that hard to find something new. His mother worked as a dentist and quickly got a new job, his father, a mechanical engineer, had no problem finding a new place to work either, so move they did.

Ever since arriving at their new house his father had not been quiet about how enjoyable it was to be far away from the big cities, the air was cleaner, the sky was clearer, the nature was idyllic, everything was in harmony and their life would no doubt only get better from here.

Jongin’s room was on the second floor, it was rather huge, right next to his brother’s bedroom and their shared bathroom, it had a quite large window section, despite the windows being old and slightly opaque; the previous owner probably smoked a lot. His bed was located right by the windows, his father originally thought of it as a terrible decision since the humidity from the window would make that part of the room colder, but Jongin wanted to sleep with a view to the stars, and in the end he got what he wanted. His desk was already messy and there were still a few storage boxes on the floor, the room was cold since the window had been opened to let fresh air in.

Somehow Jongin felt strangely at home, not home like he did in Seoul, but some feeling of belonging in the house, like he’d eventually get used to life here.

“Your uniform ended up in my room,” Jongin nearly fell forward when a pair of trousers were thrown at him, “please keep an eye on your stuff, I don’t think mum has any idea who owns what in this house anymore.” Jonghun sat down on Jongin’s bed, “this house is so fucking gross, everything looks like it hasn’t been cleaned in five hundred years, not to mention that it could collapse any minute, do you think the roof is waterproof?”

Jongin rolled his eyes, “probably. Mum and dad aren’t idiots you know, they wouldn’t let us move into a broken house, we aren’t that poor. If you look at the other three houses on this road they look a lot less nice and well-kept than ours, we should be thankful.”

“It’s not well-kept like the apartments in Seoul.” Jonghun argued, dramatically falling down on Jongin’s pillow, “at least there’s a bus stop right in front of our house, imagine having to walk in the forest to go to school, that’d suck balls.”

“The apartment buildings in central Seoul only look good because Seoul is where tourists go, this house is absolutely okay for me.” He told the truth, the house wasn’t the problem; the silence was what bothered him.

He was used to the constant buzz from the streets, and the silence currently surrounding him made Jongin feel like he had to do something _all the time_ to avoid feeling lifeless. Even though they had only been in the new house for a week or so he had already discovered that if he was not constantly occupied by something he would feel incredibly reckless, to the point of wanting to jump out of the window just to feel a little bit alive.

This meant that when his mother pecked her head inside his room and gently asked him to walk their dog Monggu he pretty much jumped out of his chair and out of the main door, nearly forgetting to put on his jacket in the process.

 

The weather was awfully humid, Jongin hadn’t taken into consideration that it would most likely start raining within the next thirty minutes when he left his house, therefore he didn’t bring an umbrella and if it started raining he’d no doubt end up catching a cold, so he decided to take a shorter route.

A little bit further down the road was the closest neighbouring house to Jongin’s, he had spent a little time wondering who his neighbours might be, but he had yet to actually meet any of them, so he found himself subconsciously stopping in the middle of his walk, his excuse being Monggu taking a pee, silently studying the old house in front of him. It looked almost identical to his own, except that the garden seemed like it hadn’t been taken care of in months. When he took a closer look he noticed that the entire house seemed like it hadn’t been taken care of in months, there weren’t any lights on in the house either; to be honest the building looked dead. Jongin shrugged, the house was probably empty, most people moved to the cities these days, it wouldn’t surprise him if the house hadn’t been inhabited for months. It saddened him a bit to acknowledge that he didn’t even have neighbours, it only made life in the countryside even more boring and quiet compared to life in Seoul.

He was just about to walk away when he heard a loud voice coming from the seemingly uninhabited house,

“I told you I didn’t mean to do it!” someone, it sounded like a boy around Jongin’s age, screamed from the top of his lungs, Jongin couldn’t hear any reply, the boy continued to shout, “stop looking at me like I did it on purpose! You always guilt-trip me! Have you ever reconsidered that I have a hard time too? If you didn’t tease me like that I would’ve left you alone!” Jongin could still not hear any reply, first he thought that the boy might be talking to someone on the phone, but then he would probably not have told the person on the other line to ‘not look at him like that’, unless it was a skype or a FaceTime call of course. It could also be that whoever he was arguing with replied in a calm tone instead of angry roars, which sounded more reasonable, considering the phone connection being complete trash out in the woods. 

“Stop it! Just stop it! I’m going to mum’s room; at least she understands my mind better than you do.”  
 Jongin decided it was time to leave, though he couldn’t help but question whatever the fuck he just heard.

 

The school bus arrived two minutes early, making Jongin happy he decided to leave home two minutes before he originally had planned, not wanting to be late on his first day at his new school. Being the biggest sleepyhead in the world he of course still managed to fall asleep on the bus, nearly missing the stop; his brother was fortunately nice enough to wake him up, rolling his eyes as Jongin nearly fell off his bus seat on his way out of the bus.

In class Jongin was placed next to a boy named Oh Sehun on his right side, a boy named Lee Taemin sitting on his left, “you should be happy about this,” Taemin mumbled as Jongin sat down, “if your seat was just a row closer to Mrs Kang you would be able to smell her bad breath.”

Jongin grimaced and turned to Sehun who sent him an awkward smile in return, not able to really say anything since class had already begun.

 

Jongin got to talk to Sehun during lunch break; said boy had a lot in common with Jongin and reminded him of his friends back in Seoul, giving Jongin a little hope about his new rural social life.

“So basically I was scouted by this dude from SM Entertainment once on a vacation in Seoul, I swear to God I tried to run away from that idiot for _hours_ before he finally gave up on me, I honestly didn’t know I looked that good,” Sehun said as he sat down on a bench next to Jongin.

Nearly spitting out his food in surprise, Jongin looked at his new friend, it would be a lie to say that he wasn’t good looking; Jongin understood why the scout had been eager to fetch Sehun, “what do you want to do then? Go to uni? If I were scouted I’d definitely say yes.”

Sehun snorted, “one thing is that my father would never allow it, another thing is that as much as I love dancing I’d consider myself absolutely tone deaf, a third thing is that I _really_ want to get a PhD in English Literature, I know it sounds pretentious but I’ve always been drawn to it for some reason. So yeah, no entertainment career for me. You should’ve seen the look on Zitao’s face when he figured out I said no though, he nearly lynched me.”

There were many things about Sehun’s reply that startled Jongin with happiness, “you like to dance? That’s really cool, I used to take dance lessons in Seoul, but I haven’t done it much lately since we still don’t know where in Busan I can take lessons, not to mention the 40 minute car ride it’ll take to get me there.”

“I lived in Busan until I was fifteen, that’s where I learned to dance, I don’t know if the dance studio is still open, if it is you should totally check it out. Taemin took lessons there too once, that’s how I got to know him before I started here,” Sehun threw an apple core at a boy who walked past them, they were eating lunch outside since the August weather was nicely sunny, “that’s Zitao.” The boy named Zitao picked up the apple core and threw it right back at Sehun who fortunately avoided it, because Zitao seemed to be using a lot more strength than Sehun, “he’s an exchange student from China, I don’t know if he’ll ever move back to the People’s Republic though, he’s lived in Korea for three years by now.”

Jongin gave Zitao an awkward wave as the Chinese boy approached them, “also the PhD sounds cool,” he reassured Sehun as Zitao sat down between them.

“Some dude from 10th grade just asked Seungwan out,” Zitao said, obviously very amused by whatever events he had witnessed before sitting down, “I’ve never seen her so confused before, _oh_ Kim Jongin?” He turned to Jongin, moving fast enough to nearly push Sehun off of the bench, “I’m Huang Zitao, I didn’t get to say hi to you in class because Mrs Kang didn’t give us a second to get to know you; she’s annoying like that. Anyway I see you’ve taken a liking to Sehun; I understand that, he’s very likeable.” Jongin swore he saw Sehun blush, “where do you live? I haven’t seen any new people around in the town lately?”

Jongin couldn’t recall the name of the road he lived on, “by the woods, a few minutes from the village, it’s a very calm area.”

Zitao nodded, “then that’s why, well I’ve got to go, I’m not fully done with my maths homework yet, and I don’t want Mr Lee to brutally murder me.”

“You live by the forest?” Sehun asked as Zitao ran off, “could I go to your place after school to study? My brother’s in the middle of moving out so everything is pretty chaotic at the moment.”

Delighted by how easy it was to make friends, Jongin happily nodded, “sure, our house is a bit of a mess too since we’re still unpacking storage boxes, but my parents and brother most likely won’t disturb us.”

 

Instead of actually spending their time studying they ended up playing football for almost two hours. Sehun fell asleep on the bus on their way home, so he insisted on doing some kind of physical activity to get his energy back; Jongin instantly agreed (anything was better than studying).

“Hey that house over there,” Sehun suddenly pointed out, nodding at the house Jongin had walked past the other day, “that’s Do Kyungsoo’s house, he’s in the same class as us but he wasn’t in school today.” Due to being preoccupied with talking Sehun didn’t notice the ball Jongin just kicked toward him, it ended up in the lake instead, “bullshit.”

Letting out a big sigh Jongin took a look around, he was sure they had a butterfly net somewhere, that would probably be useful for picking up the ball with, “Do Kyungsoo? I did hear someone talking inside the house the other day when I walked my dog,” he left out the part about the yelling, there was no reason to spill any of Kyungsoo’s secrets before he’d even met the guy, “is he often absent from school?” He passed the butterfly net to Sehun.

“Well he’s not absent a lot; he’s just stays home a bit more than the rest of us. I don’t know him very well, I only know he lives here because I did a group project with him a few months ago, his family’s house is nice,” whilst leaning forward to capture the ball with the net, Sehun lost his balance and fell into the water with a big splash, “for fuck’s sake,” he cursed, throwing the ball at Jongin, “the water here’s really gross.”

Trying his best to hold back his laughter, Jongin offered his new friend a hand as he tried to get up from the lake, “at least you got the ball?”

Sending Jongin an angry grimace, Sehun crossly threw the net down on the grass, “you should’ve picked it up, not me, you were the one who kicked it into the lake anyway.”

“You were the one who was too busy talking to actually play football,” Jongin put his arm around Sehun, “let’s go inside, you can borrow some of my clothes.”

 

They made cocoa after Sehun changed his clothes, then they finally opened their schoolbooks to study, but none of them were very motivated to actually do it, “I’m kind of relieved to know that someone else from our class is my neighbour,” Jongin beamed as he sat down to Sehun, still amused by the annoyed look on the other boy’s face, “what’s Kyungsoo like?”

Sehun shrugged, “strange? That’s all I can say, as mentioned before I don’t know him well, he doesn’t really have any friends at school, not because people bully him or anything, he just seems to hate everyone for no reason. The only one who still tries to befriend him is Baekhyun, but he’s an idiot who doesn’t know when a joke’s not funny anymore.”

“Some people are just naturally introverted I guess?” Jongin tried to read a paragraph in his maths book, but it was like his brain merely registered the words instead of actually understanding what he was reading.

Taking a sip from his cocoa, Sehun shrugged one more time, “he had a lot of books in his room, so perhaps he likes to read, he doesn’t get very good grades though so it sounds a bit unlikely, I really don’t know. Let’s forget about Kyungsoo and look at our own homework instead, I swear to God no word in any language can describe how much I hate maths.”

 

Jongin decided to try to keep an eye on Kyungsoo the next day, but said boy was absent from school yet again. Jongin should’ve known not to put his hopes up when he and his brother were the only people at the bus stop that morning, exactly like the day before. He sighed as he took a seat by the window, putting on his headphones, staying home from school for more than one day was not a good idea at all, he knew all too well.

“Since Do Kyungsoo isn’t at school today either and you have an important written assignment coming up, would anyone volunteer to give him his homework? Do any of you live close to him? If that’s the case you could drop by his house and give him the worksheet.” Their English teacher Mr Im asked as their last period of the day was about to end.

Quickly raising his hand, Jongin smiled at their teacher, “I’ll do it, he’s my neighbour so it’s no problem, I’ll brief him about it, I promise.”

Mr Im nodded, “good, and tell him he better actually hand a paper in this time, he’s failing.”

A boy sitting behind Jongin gasped a bit too loudly for what was socially acceptable, “you’re Kyungie’s neighbour? Oh you’re so lucky; tell him hi from me, ohhhh!! Also tell him that I hope he comes back to school soon because I really miss him and I hope he’s okay, if he’s sick then tell him I hope he feels better soon!” Jongin looked at the boy’s nametag; ‘Byun Baekhyun’, the guy Sehun had told him about.

“Uh sure, I’ll tell him what you just said.”

“Super! Thank you so much Nini!”

 _Nini_? Jongin frowned at the nickname, “yeah, no problem.” Perhaps Baekhyun just preferred to be overly cutesy-friendly with everyone, hence calling Kyungsoo ‘Kyungie’ despite the two of them (according to Sehun at least) not being very close.

 

Saying that he was nervous standing in front of Kyungsoo’s house was an understatement, Jongin felt his hands getting sweaty as he mentally rehearsed what he was going to say to his neighbour when the door opened.

Despite having a script ready in his mind for how the conversation was going to be, Jongin was completely blank when a short (ten centimetres shorter than himself?) boy with big eyes appeared in front of him, “yes?”

Not knowing what in the world he should say, Jongin just smiled awkwardly at the boy, who was most likely Do Kyungsoo himself, standing in the entrance, “uh, uh, uhm, I just moved here and I go to the same school as you, we’re in the same class actually. Mr Im gave us a new written assignment, very important he says eh, so I wanted to give you the worksheet, if you’re even Do Kyungsoo, holy shit if you’re not then this is really awkward.”

The boy’s eyes lit up, “I see! Yes I am Kyungsoo, do you mind coming in for a few minutes? If you have time it’d be really nice if you would give me a short summary of what happened at school while I was home, your name is?”

Jongin followed Kyungsoo inside, quickly taking his shoes off in the hallway, “my name’s Jongin, of course I’ll help you catch up. Mr Im suggested it’d be a good idea too since he-“ was it rude to say that Mr Im told him that Kyungsoo was failing? Jongin wasn’t quite sure, “since he doesn’t want you to get a bad grade because you were absent.”

Kyungsoo nodded, “I understand completely. Hey, could you maybe not talk too loudly? My mum and brother are sleeping upstairs, they both have quite hectic schedules these days and my brother caught a cold the other day so they need rest.”

“Of course, I’m sorry.” The first room they walked into was the kitchen; it looked like it hadn’t been cleaned in months, almost as if nobody had used it in all that time, just like the garden. There was a huge pile of dishes in the sink, the table was dusty, and the light from the lamp on the ceiling kept flickering. Hopefully the house had looked different when Sehun was here, since he described it as a nice place. Another remarkable thing was the cold, it took Jongin a few seconds to notice since the temperature outside was warm enough for a lot of heating inside to not be needed, but after being in the house for a few minutes one could not help but notice how freezing it was, “I was asked to say hi to you from Baekhyun,” Jongin mumbled as they proceeded to the living room, which Kyungsoo had decided was the best room for studying.

An annoyed groan came from Kyungsoo’s mouth, Jongin didn’t know if it was due to the mention of Baekhyun or because the shorter boy accidently walked into the coffee table, “I cannot put into words how much that guy annoys me,” so it was because of Baekhyun. Kyungsoo sat down on the couch, making room for Jongin to sit next to him.

Dust could easily be seen flying around in the light (no matter how flickering or vague it was) from a lamp standing next to the sofa, when it came to cleanliness the living room was sure no different from the kitchen.

It seemed as if nobody had bothered to clean it for a long, long time. It smelled weird too, Jongin couldn’t pinpoint exactly what it smelled like, but it was an unusual and odd odour, not one that belonged in living rooms. However he decided to not mention anything about it, not wanting to offend Kyungsoo or his other family members who probably had their reasons for their house to be messy like this, “so… where do we start with this briefing-thingy?”

Kyungsoo gave the worksheet back to Jongin, “could you perhaps read it for me? I don’t read well.” That partly explained why his grades were so bad, it would make sense if that was the reason at least.

“Sure,” Jongin started reading from the worksheet, Kyungsoo nodded along.

They spent all afternoon going through the stuff from school Kyungsoo had missed, afterward they did their new homework together; Jongin concluded that Kyungsoo was a way better study buddy than Sehun.

 

Since they had bonded so well yesterday, Jongin was very excited about riding the bus to school with his neighbour by his side, talking to someone could probably give him the extra energy he needed to actually stay awake both physically and mentally during the first periods of the day.

Kyungsoo waved at him when he appeared at the bus stop, “did you sleep well?”

Jongin nodded, “I slept well but I didn’t sleep enough, please wake me up if I fall asleep on the bus.” Then a loud growling sound came from the shorter boy’s stomach and Jongin’s eyes flew to Kyungsoo, “did you not eat breakfast?” Taking a closer look at the other boy he quickly noticed that Kyungsoo’s uniform seemed to be stained with something, as if he’d spilt food on it a long time ago and never got to clean it off.

“Ah I was too busy, I had to check on my brother and mum too, then I forgot where I put my pencil case and I had to look for it for hours, suddenly I was running late and I didn’t have time for breakfast,” the bus arrived just as Kyungsoo finished his sentence, the shorter boy walked first and nearly tripped on the step, so Jongin had to quickly put an arm around his waist in order for Kyungsoo to not fall over, “what a nice way to start the day,” his neighbour muttered before making his way to the back of the bus.

When they finally sat down Jongin could see the stains on Kyungsoo’s uniform clearly, and unfortunately it didn’t take a long time for him to notice what it was, “is that blood on your shirt?” It wasn’t his intention to confront Kyungsoo about it, but the shock made it hard to refrain from doing so.

Kyungsoo shifted awkwardly in his seat, “stop talking about that, unless you want to die?” the words sounded like a joke, but his tone made it obvious that he wanted to avoid the subject, so Jongin kept quiet for the rest of the ride to school.


	2. Unanswered

Jongin really wanted to talk to Kyungsoo at school, but the other boy’s introverted tendencies made it pretty difficult to do so. That did however not keep Jongin from sitting down beside him during lunch break, hoping their awkward bus conversation was forgotten, “so… what do you like to do in your free time?” Jongin wanted to slap himself in the face, but Kyungsoo’s fascinated expression quickly changed his mind and he suddenly felt very satisfied with himself.

“I like to sing, I also like to cook!” Everything intimidating about Kyungsoo completely vanished; Jongin didn’t quite know what to think about it, “my brother likes space a lot so we often stargaze at night.”

 _Stargazing_ , Jongin had to pinch his arm to avoid jumping up and down with excitement, “I love stargazing too! Well, not because I’m all into astronomy, just because stars are beautiful, they’re way prettier in the countryside; it was difficult to really spot them in Seoul.”

Kyungsoo looked so much like he actually _cared_ about what Jongin said that it made the latter feel all flustered, fearing that he might blush, “I’ve never been to Seoul,” Kyungsoo then said, smiling shyly at Jongin, “it’s nice there though, isn’t it?”

“You’ve never been to Seoul?” It wasn’t Jongin’s intent to sound so surprised (or loud), “not that there’s anything wrong with that! Seoul is far away from here, why would you go anyway? I’d never been in Busan before I moved to this village, it’s only normal for someone to not have seen the entire country.”

“My mum has never been interested in travelling, we have enough here, that’s what she says at least,” there was a sadness hinted in Kyungsoo’s voice, Jongin couldn’t help but feel slightly sorry for his new friend.

Looking down at his lunchbox, Jongin noticed that Kyungsoo had already eaten all his food while he had barely had a chance to get a bite down himself, “but you want to travel, right? Where do you want to go?”

Letting out a deep sigh, Kyungsoo looked dreamily out of the window, “I want to go to America and watch Broadway musicals, I want to visit Iceland too, to see all the volcanoes and geysers. In all honesty,” he looked back at Jongin, “just going to Busan would make me happy.”

Jongin’s jaw dropped, “you’ve never been to Busan? That’s like… that’s only 40 minutes from here! Where _have_ you been?”

“Here.”

“No way!” Jongin couldn’t believe it, there was no way Kyungsoo could’ve lived his entire life in this village without ever going to the nearby cities, there was just simply no way, “you’ve never left this village, how have you not gone crazy yet?”

Kyungsoo flinched at the mention of the word ‘crazy’, Jongin wished he could take his words back, “well as I said, my mum doesn’t really like travelling, so we’ve simply stayed here. She likes it like this, so yeah, I think I’d be terrified if I ever actually went to a real city.”

That opened a whole new possibility, “we could go together?” Jongin didn’t know if it was a bit too much to ask for since they’d only known each other for a day, but he felt like Kyungsoo could eventually become a very good friend of his, and holding a small-talk conversation with Kyungsoo was very easy compared to other people, “to Busan? We could always bring someone else with us so we don’t get lost. Maybe your brother wants to come too?”

“I don’t think my brother is capable of going anytime soon, he’s very, uh, busy,” Kyungsoo looked at his hands, “but I’m telling the truth when I tell you that you don’t need to take your time to bring me to Busan, it’s not your fault that I’ve never been anywhere. You should ask Sehun and Zitao to take you instead, they know their way around the city and they’re way funnier company than me, except that you may feel a little bit like a third wheel around them. There’s always Taemin too, I saw you talking to him the other day, he’s a very nice guy I suppose.”

Jongin shook his head, “no the entire point was to go with _you_ because you’ve never been there. We could maybe arrange so it’s you, me, Zitao, and Sehun? Then they can show the two of us around?”

Kyungsoo seemed to reconsider the offer, “I don’t know Zitao or Sehun very well-“

“Then who do you know well? We can just ask them to come with us, also _if_ we brought along Zitao and Sehun you’d get to know them better. I don’t know them well either, I just moved here you know.”

“I don’t know anyone well.”

“Oh,” Jongin felt utterly stupid, Sehun had told him that Kyungsoo didn’t really have any close friends in class, all he had done now was probably to remind the other boy of just how much of an outsider he was, “why aren’t you close to anyone in class? I-I mean,” Jongin had never wanted to disappear from the surface of Earth as much as he wanted to now, _why the fuck do you keep asking stupid questions?_ He cursed mentally before continuing, “what I’m trying to ask you is, maybe you’d be able to make some good friends if you spend a little more time with them?”

None of them said anything for a while, Kyungsoo kept his eyes away from Jongin, Jongin wanted to shoot himself three billion times, “it’s a bit more complicated than that, I’ve always had a hard time talking to other people, it’s not like I hate everyone for no reason, it’s just that most people just find a way to annoy me? I don’t know, I’m fine with not really having any close friends at school though, it’s nice to be by myself.”

His words made Jongin question their friendship, “but you want to talk to me, right? Please tell me if you want me to leave.”

“Trust me, if I wanted you to leave you’d know by now,” the intimidation in Kyungsoo’s voice returned as fast as it had left, “I suppose talking to you is easier for some reason, maybe it’s because I met you under such calm circumstances yesterday, I don’t know.”

“That’s nice to kno-“ Jongin was cut off as the bell rang loudly, making him feel sad about the fact that he didn’t have any more time to talk to Kyungsoo, “do you want to go to my house after school? I liked studying with you yesterday; I get a lot more work done than when I’m with Sehun. Maybe we could look at that new English assignment?”

Kyungsoo nodded eagerly, “on one condition, I get to eat dinner at your house too.”

“No problem.”

 

The bus ride home went by quietly, Jongin slept most of the time and Kyungsoo gently woke him up when they arrived at their stop. His new friend also praised the furniture in Jongin’s house, causing Jongin’s mum to flail around like someone who just won the lottery. They did their homework together in Jongin’s room, completely undisturbed by ‘neither Jonghun nor Jongin’s parents; Jongin helped his neighbour by reading pages from their textbooks out loud (it turned out Kyungsoo had a very hard time reading just a simple sentence, and even then he’d put the book so close to his face that Jongin feared for his sanity, yet he chose not to say anything and just offer to help by reading instead), they quickly got through their maths problems (Kyungsoo was a lot better at maths than English), and even had a little time left to watch TV before Jongin’s mum called them down for dinner, which would turn out a lot more complicated than he’d hoped.

“Is that your boyfriend?” Jonghun mockingly asked as Kyungsoo and Jongin sat down beside each other at the dining table, Jongin holding the chair for Kyungsoo who almost fell to the floor when he tried to sit down, his clumsiness was pretty cute in Jongin’s eyes, another thing he chose not to speak about.

Every time Jongin brought a male friend to his house Jonghun would spend the entire time questioning them being a potential love interest, it made Jongin wish he’d never come out to his brother all those years ago. It wasn’t something they spoke about at home, his parents knew it too and they were more than okay with it,

Jongin himself was totally clarified with it too, however he very much disliked how Jonghun would not shut up about it, as if it was something revolutionary to be gay. “He’s not my boyfriend, leave it there Jonghun.”

“You’re gay?” Kyungsoo asked without any hint of emotion in his voice, Jongin felt himself tense, he hadn’t thought of the other boy possibly being homophobic before bringing him home.

“Well, yes,” he sent Jonghun an angry glare, “but I’d rather we don’t talk about it, it’s a little awkward and I don’t think it helps anyone-“

“I’m gay too,” Kyungsoo said, locking eyes with Jonghun, “I’m not dating Jongin though.”

Jonghun smirked, Jongin’s mouth was agape, his heart nearly jumped out of his chest and he felt a sense of relief running through his body. One thing was that he’d have another topic to talk to Kyungsoo about, another thing was that he now had a friend who hundred percent would _not_ judge him when it came to his sexuality. “You are?”

“Mhm,” Kyungsoo nodded, like it was the most normal thing in the world, “it makes good sense actually, we’re a class of what, twenty students? Statistically two to five of us could - or I suppose you could say _should_ \- be something else than heterosexual. Do you want to know who? Just promise me you don’t spill them to everyone, the only reason I know is because I always run into people making out.”

Jongin felt his cheeks burn, he eyed his parents who were busy talking about something else, “who?” He lowered his voice, hoping Jonghun chose to listen to their parents’ conversation instead.

“Zitao is bisexual, I saw him hook up with Sehun in the locker room after P.E., Sehun isn’t gay though, he just likes Zitao. I asked them so I know. And then there’s this girl named Park Sunyoung, chances are you don’t know her yet, she’s bisexual too, I know because I saw her make out with Amber Liu in the library last year, Amber’s graduated since, Sunyoung’s with a guy now.” Kyungsoo looked almost proud of his extreme knowledge of his classmates’ love lives.

What however wasn’t as pleasing about both Jongin and Kyungsoo being gay was that it was the world’s best loophole for Jonghun to tease them even more, “if you’re both gay you should totally date. I doubt that there are many other gay males your age in this area, the other ones in your class already have it going on I see.”

“Please stop.” Jongin sighed at his brother, praying to God Kyungsoo wouldn’t hate him after this.

“Jongin and Kyungsoo sit in a tree, K-I-S-“

“Oh my God Jonghun how old are you, five?” Jongin hissed as his brother finally shut up.

Kyungsoo leaned closer to Jongin, “this makes me want to kill him,” he mumbled before he went back to eating his food. Jongin knew it was meant as a joke; at least he wanted to believe that it was meant as a joke, but the tone of Kyungsoo’s voice made it sound like anything but that, just like their conversation on the bus this morning.

They sat in silence for a while until Jongin’s mum finally asked them to for goodness’ sake just eat the food she had placed in front of them. At the exact moment she told them to eat Kyungsoo started shoving food into his mouth, for a moment Jongin was scared that his mum would think his new friend was impolite, but she just sent Kyungsoo a grateful smile, “sweetheart you’re eating like you haven’t seen food in days, does your mother not feed you at home?”

“I’m the one who cooks,” Kyungsoo confessed with a somewhat sad expression on his face, Jongin felt his heart sink, “so it’s rarely as good as this. I also forgot to eat breakfast this morning so I think that might be why I’m extra hungry today.”

Jongin recalled how Kyungsoo had eaten his lunchbox at superhuman speed in school today, “why doesn’t your mother cook for you?”

“She’s busy with work so she’s always very tired. I don’t mind it, I like cooking; I’m just not as good at it as your mum is.”

 

Like some gentleman from a Hollywood movie Jongin decided to walk Kyungsoo home, it seemed a little stupid since his house was literally only a minute away, but Jongin felt like he owed his neighbour something after the terrible dinner comments from his brother.

The weather was slightly cold but still humid so they passed several frogs on their way to the house, Jongin tried his best to not seem absolutely horrified by the animals’ presence, though Kyungsoo’s reaction told him he failed miserably, “I don’t think it’s their intent to hurt you.”

Jongin rolled his eyes, “they’re still pretty gross,” they were in front of Kyungsoo’s home already, “it’s goodnight from here I suppose.” _You asshat_ , he cursed himself, _do you think this is some kind of romantic drama?_

“Ah damn it,” he heard Kyungsoo mumble from the entrance, “the door is locked, I forgot my key this morning since I was in such a rush.”

“Shit, will you be okay?” Jongin walked up beside Kyungsoo and tried to open the door, as if it wasn’t already obvious that it was locked.

Kyungsoo nodded, “yeah I’ll just call my mum and get her to come out and open it for me, you should go home now before you catch a cold. Sleep well.”

“Yeah you too,” Jongin mumbled as he took a step back, slowly making his way back to his own house, “you sleep well too.”

 

Since he had fallen asleep with his window open, sounds coming from outside were way louder and would therefore easily wake Jongin up. He knew that, but it didn’t keep him from nearly getting a heart attack when he was awakened in the middle of the night by the sound of glass shattering piercingly, it sounded almost as if someone had thrown a rock through a window with superhuman strength. Jongin immediately got up from his bed and looked out of his window; despite the sound being extremely clear to him it was still too far away for it to be a window in his own house shattering. He tried to spot Kyungsoo’s house in the distance, feeling kind of worried about the fact that someone might be trying to either vandalise or break into the other boy’s house.

Unfortunately the weather was very foggy, making it impossible for Jongin to see further than his own backyard, so he saw no other option than to close his window and go back to sleep.

 

There were many things in life Jongin didn’t expect to see, one of them was Baekhyun’s overly cheery happy-go-lucky face at _his_ bus stop early in the morning, “you don’t even live here,” he muttered as the shorter boy pulled Jongin into a hug.

“Wow Einstein,” Baekhyun teased and ruffled Jongin’s hair, having to stand on his toes to do so, “I asked my mum to drive me here so I could take the bus with Kyungsoo for once. We haven’t talked in a long time!”

The look on Kyungsoo’s face when he saw Baekhyun waiting for him was priceless yet extremely depressing, the bright smile that covered his face when he first came to say hi to Jongin was replaced by a grimace of pure disgust when his eyes fell on Baekhyun, “what the fuck are you doing here?”

Baekhyun completely ignored (or failed to notice) Kyungsoo’s repelled face, instead he pulled the other boy into a tight hug, causing Kyungsoo to let out a violent series of coughs, “I’ve missed you squishy!” Baekhyun happily said as he ruffled Kyungsoo’s hair as well, “did you sleep well tonight?”

The words reminded Jongin that he had to ask if Kyungsoo heard the shattering glass as well, but he estimated that now was not the right time or place.

“I asked you what the fuck you were doing here not if you missed- _don’t fucking touch me you asshole_! I’m not talking any more to you so just- ugh for Hell’s sake Baekhyun get away from me!” Jongin nearly dropped his phone in shock when Kyungsoo started shouting at Baekhyun, kicking said boy between his legs before turning around to face Jongin instead, “I cannot believe this.”

Jongin sent an apologetic look in Baekhyun’s direction, “I don’t want you to hate me too, but what exactly did Baekhyun do to you? He just wanted to spend some time with you, you could’ve just gently said no if you didn’t want to talk to him.”

“I’m not having this conversation right now,” Kyungsoo angrily muttered as the bus finally arrived, “I’ll tell you later or something,” he sighed as he dropped down on a seat next to Jongin, leaving Baekhyun sitting alone a few rows behind them with disappointed eyes. Jongin actually felt kind of sorry for him but he knew better than to upset Kyungsoo, so he decided to ignore it.

 

Most of the day went by smoothly, only for P.E. to come along and ruin everything. To tell the truth P.E. had always been Jongin’s favourite subject; he loved getting a break from all the boring reading and calculating for a while and get to move his body a bit instead.

The fuss already started in the locker room when a boy whose nametag read ‘Park Chanyeol’ decided to tell everyone a joke; he stood up on one of the benches and asked all the other boys to keep quiet so he could tell whatever magnificent pun he had up his sleeve to everyone. In the end it turned out to be pretty funny, so most of them, Jongin included, ended up laughing. Kyungsoo did however not, which seemingly pissed Chanyeol off, “why are you always so extra about being mysterious and angry?” He asked the shorter boy with a frustrated voice, “why can’t you just laugh at a joke like everyone else does?”

“Ah Chanyeol please,” a boy Jongin didn’t know yet yelled from the other side of the room, “it was funny but you’ve told better jokes than that, maybe his expectations for you were just too high.”   
Chanyeol rolled his eyes, “’not one of my better’, excuse you Jongdae when did you last make Kyungsoo laugh? I don’t think you’ve ever made him show any other emotions than annoyance.”

“Oh yeah because you have?”

“FIGHT!” Sehun excitedly yelled from beside Jongin, who turned to Kyungsoo instead. The shorter boy looked at Chanyeol like he wanted to chop his head off, Jongin feared for the tall boy’s safety.

Fortunately, the class was soon to begin and they all hurried outside before any actual fight could break out.

The peace was unluckily only temporary, because Chanyeol was incapable of letting Kyungsoo’s lack of humour go, causing him to feel the need to confront said boy about it in the middle of a lacrosse game. Jongin stood close enough to hear the entire thing go down, Sehun and Zitao placed right next to him, not interested in missing out on any gossip.

“Listen,” Chanyeol mumbled, “I get you’re kind of introverted and all that, but could you at least pretend not to hate everybody and everything around you for just like a second? We’ve done nothing to you yet you act like we’ve cursed your entire family or something. It’s not my fault your sense of humour is so twisted you can’t even find a basic pun funny.”

The look on Kyungsoo’s face showed nothing but pure loathing and hatred, if Jongin had feared for Chanyeol’s safety before he was now ready to call the cops for protection, “why can’t _you_ just accept that not all of us are fucking aroused by your shitty jokes? The only thing you ever do is talking about yourself and cracking jokes, it gets tiring after a while.” Kyungsoo took a step to the side so he wouldn’t get hit by the ball that was thrown at them.

“Yeah but you don’t have to be so mean about it!” Chanyeol exclaimed, “I get you don’t think I’m funny and okay whatever I can get past that, what I can’t get past is you hating on the entire universe with a passion stronger than Zitao’s passion for shopping and _that’s_ tiring after years of seeing nothing but anger on your face.”

Kyungsoo’s face was now boiling red, his fist clenched and his eyes closed in what looked like an attempt to control his temper, “I give you one chance to shut the fuck up or you’re going to regret it.”

Chanyeol let out a groan, “now you’re doing it again! This is exactly what I’m talking about! Baekhyun told me he went to your bus stop this morning to talk to you and you acted like he was a cockroach or something, why does it hurt you so much to be nice?!”

The tall boy just got to finish his sentence before Kyungsoo threw himself at him, dropping his lacrosse equipment in the process. All people on the field immediately stopped moving mid-game to observe the fight that was starting to turn rather violent. As small and vulnerable as Kyungsoo appeared to be, he sure didn’t let it hold him back in a fight. He sat on top of Chanyeol, constantly throwing punches at the other boy’s face, angrily gritting his teeth. It seemed a lot like Kyungsoo was going to win the fight until Chanyeol got him pushed over, sending a blow strong enough to knock anyone out to the other boy’s face. But strong as he was Kyungsoo simply sent a fist to Chanyeol’s stomach, knocking all air out of said boy’s stomach, causing him to fall to the ground as he tried to steady his breathing.

Jongin frowned nervously as Kyungsoo slowly got up from the field, nearly stumbling forward doing so. Just as everyone thought the fight was over, he sent a final kick to Chanyeol’s stomach. He then let out a cough as he turned to the rest of his classmates. Jongin noticed that the short boy had earned himself a split lip and something that looked a suspiciously lot like a black eye forming on his left eyelid.

“What in the name of Jesus do you two think you’re doing?” Their P.E. teacher hissed as he helped Chanyeol stand, “both of you go to the infirmary immediately; go to the principal’s office afterward. How old are the two of you? You can expect to see a drop in your grades, that’s for the both of you!”

Kyungsoo sent Chanyeol one last angry glare before he quietly left the field, Jongin’s eyes fell on Baekhyun who looked like he wanted to cry.

“The rest of you!” Their teacher yelled, obviously not in a good mood, “get back to the game, just because two of you decided to act like kindergarteners doesn’t mean you all have to space out.”

 

Not really knowing what mood to expect from the other boy, Jongin decided to save a spot beside him in the bus for Kyungsoo after school. For a moment he wondered if the other boy wouldn’t come, however just a minute before the bus was about to drive Kyungsoo walked in, keeping his eyes on the floor in front of him.   
Jongin quickly removed his backpack from the seat next to him, but Kyungsoo ignored it and continued to the very back of the bus where he sat down alone by the window, still not looking up.


	3. One Step Closer

Jongin felt rather sad when he came home that afternoon, his brother had gone to a friend’s house so he thought he’d be home alone for a while, but when he opened the main door a sweet smell from the kitchen hit him, and he realised that his mum apparently was home as well, “are you baking?” Despite still sulking over Kyungsoo’s distant behaviour Jongin had a hard time hiding his excitement at the thought of food.

“It’s a carrot cake,” his mother pulled him into a hug when he stepped into the kitchen and he had to wrestle his way out, “it’s almost done. Are you not having any friends over today?”

Sighing, Jongin shook his head, “unfortunately not, no. I didn’t even get to talk to Sehun and Kyungsoo was kind of grumpy today.”

His mum looked thoughtful for a second or two; then her face lit up, “how about you take some of the cake to Kyungsoo’s house and share it with him there? If he’s the only one who cooks at home he probably doesn’t get to eat sweets like this very often, that might cheer him up a bit.”

Considering it for a moment, Jongin found himself nodding, “that’s a good idea; I’ll go finish my homework first.” Jongin prayed to God that it was possible for him to lift Kyungsoo’s mood a bit, he hadn’t liked the murderous expression on the shorter boy’s face at all when he attacked Chanyeol on the lacrosse field.

 

It became 7:30 PM before Jongin could finally call himself done with the homework of the day. He ate dinner a lot faster than usual, wanting to go to Kyungsoo’s house before it got too dark outside. “Be home before midnight!” His father shouted from the dining room as Jongin hurried out of the door.

The late-August wind outside was colder than it had been the past days, the usual humidity seemed to be completely gone so Jongin quickened his pace, not knowing exactly what to expect when he got to Kyungsoo’s house since said boy had proven himself very two-faced in P.E. class.

Yet even though he thought he was prepared for just about anything, he still got shocked when he arrived at his neighbour’s house. The door was kicked in, there was seemingly not a single light turned on in the entire house, only the buzzing sound from a TV hinting that the building wasn’t completely empty. “H-hello?” Jongin anxiously called, not really enjoying the situation.

The buzz from the television ended abruptly, as if it had just been turned off, and soon Kyungsoo appeared in front of Jongin, wearing nothing but his boxers and a white t-shirt that looked way too big for his small frame, “hi,” there weren’t any emotions in his voice, he sounded tired more than anything, “is that for me?” He eyed the cake in Jongin’s hands.

Jongin nodded awkwardly, slowly stepping into the house, “are you out of electricity?” With the door being, well, gone, the temperature in the house had dropped to frighteningly cold degrees, Jongin was still wearing a sweatshirt and jeans, but that didn’t keep him from freezing his butt off. A single look at Kyungsoo’s legs made him shiver, “also what happened to your door? It’s freezing in here; you’re going to catch pneumonia or something.”

Kyungsoo shrugged, “it’s not that bad, you get used to it,” despite his words Jongin noticed that the other boy’s nose sounded rather stuffed, as if he was about to catch a cold.

“And your door?”

“Let’s not talk about that right now,” Kyungsoo mumbled as he led Jongin to the kitchen, the first thing he spotted in there was that one of the windows were broken, in his mind he relived the sound of shattering glass the other night. “Do you want to sit down?” Kyungsoo pulled out a chair by a small table in the middle of the kitchen, apparently having no intentions to put on pants, Jongin didn’t know if he was more disturbed by how cold the other teen must be or if he was simply distracted by the fact that Kyungsoo had very nice legs - no matter which of the two that happened to be the answer, he tried his best not to look.

Jongin was just about to take a bite of his own piece of cake when he noticed that there was a knife and not a fork next to his plate, “uh where do you keep your silver wear? I think you accidently gave me a knife.”

The other boy’s cheeks reddened as he looked down on his own hand, he wasn’t holding a fork either, instead his fingers were placed around a spoon, “I see,” he mumbled, standing up from his chair, “they’re in the first drawer beside the sink, yes there.”

“Did you take your contacts out or something?” Jongin tried to joke, “I don’t know many people who are able to mistake a knife for a fork.”

“I don’t use contacts.”

Embarrassing silence; Jongin quickly sat down on his seat again, “we’re all a bit clumsy I guess. That wasn’t what I wanted to ask you. I came here to ask if you were okay after what happened today.”

Nearly dropping his cake in surprise, Kyungsoo stared at Jongin with wide eyes, “you were worried about me being okay?”

“Of course,” Jongin’s eyes fell on the wide-eyed boy’s lips, there was a small wound forming on his lower lip from where Chanyeol had punched him earlier, “it was quite a fight.”

Kyungsoo chuckled, something Jongin didn’t think he’d ever get to hear, “I’m completely fine. I was just not in the mood for company when we went home on the bus; it has been a pretty challenging day for me. I recall telling you that for some reason I get annoyed by the smallest things, Chanyeol pushed the barrier a tad too much today, I’m sorry it had to happen in front of everyone.”

Jongin shook his head, “oh no don’t apologise! Some of the things Chanyeol said were rather unnecessary. I’m glad to hear that you’re fine now though,” their eyes met and Jongin swore he felt his heart beat faster for a moment. He looked down at the table to hide his hot pink cheeks; they were both done eating already,

“I should probably just head home.”

“No!” Kyungsoo leaned forward to grab Jongin’s shoulder, “it’s not that late yet, please stay for a little longer? My mum and brother are sleeping and there’s no good television at this hour.”

“No problem,” Jongin felt his palms getting sweaty due to nervousness as Kyungsoo touched him, “should we do the dishes then?”

Kyungsoo grimaced at the large pile of plates and bowls in the sink behind them, it hadn’t reduced in size since the last time Jongin was here, “I’ll do it tomorrow, maybe my brother will keep me company if he’s not too tired.”

“Are your mum and brother always sleeping? I don’t think you ever talk about them doing anything else.” It was totally not the time or place to drop a comment like that, but Jongin didn’t realise until the words had left his mouth.

Fortunately, Kyungsoo was able to somewhat laugh it off, “as I’ve told you many times now, my mum works a lot, my brother is busy with school, so of course they’re tired when they get home.”

 _And your father?_ Jongin wanted to ask, though he didn’t because he wasn’t _that_ stupid, “anything in particular you want to do? We could go to your room maybe? I haven’t seen-.”

“My room is too messy!” Kyungsoo exclaimed before Jongin even got to finish his sentence, “also it’s right next to my mum’s and even though she’s a heavy sleeper we might wake her up. Let’s just stay downstairs; we can go to the living room if you want to.” It was more of an order than an offer because Kyungsoo immediately started walking out of the kitchen.

As soon as they got into the living room the weird odour from the other day returned instantly, only this time it was a whole lot stronger. Jongin could, just like the last time, not remember having smelled something similar ever before, but the scent was far from nice, and Jongin wondered how in the world it could be so strong when the house didn’t even have a front door anymore. He tried to turn on the lights by pressing a light switch, yet nothing happened, “oh right, you were out of electricity,” he frowned as he remembered how the lamp in the kitchen had flickered a lot but still functioned kind of normally, maybe it was only the living room that was out of light.

“The light bulb is broken,” Kyungsoo mumbled as he looked through some drawers, “I’ll use a candle.” Just as Kyungsoo had placed a candle on the coffee table, he turned around (probably to get a lighter or something, Jongin supposed) only to bump right into Jongin and send them both to the ground. “I’m so sorry,” the shorter boy yelled out in shock as he instantly looked away to avoid eye contact.

The only thing on Jongin’s mind however was that he had used his left hand in an attempt to catch Kyungsoo, and therefore it was placed on the other boy’s waist underneath his t-shirt, feeling the cold skin pressed against his fingers, “it’s okay,” he assured his friend as they both got up, Jongin still holding onto Kyungsoo for no reason in particular other than that Jongin liked the sense of adrenaline running through his body. “Nobody got hurt, no furniture is ruined, and it didn’t sound like it woke up ‘neither your brother nor mother, so no need to worry.”

Slowly letting go of Jongin, Kyungsoo lit the candle on the table, afterward he dropped down on the sofa, resting his chin against his knees, Jongin saw this as an invite to sit down next to him, which he did, “I’m just so tired,” Kyungsoo mumbled as he hid his face in his hands, “nothing goes right these days.”

Jongin awkwardly placed his hand on the other boy’s shoulder as a form of comfort, “it’s not that bad, we all have our off-days.”

“It’s not just off-days,” Kyungsoo hissed back, “it’s _every fucking day_ , an off-life. My temper gets shorter every second even if I’m with someone I like, I keep tripping and falling over everything because I haven’t gotten my glasses fixed yet-“

“You use glasses?” Jongin recalled watching Kyungsoo bump into tables, fall over steps, mistaking the knife for a fork, not being able to read; _not being able to read!_ “You need to get your glassed fixed as soon as possible then! How are you supposed to do well in school if you can’t see anything? You definitely need to go to Busan if you want to fix them, use that as an excuse to get your mum to take you out of this village.”

Kyungsoo shook his head, finally looking up from his hands, “my mum is optician, she usually fixes them for me, but she hasn’t had time lately because she’s been too busy.”

“Maybe,” Jongin was still stroking Kyungsoo’s back and since the shorter boy didn’t seem to be upset by it he had no intent to stop, “your temper is a little worse these days because your mother and brother haven’t had much time for you? If you were the type to get easily pissed off already, which is completely okay, then it probably only adds fuel to the fire, if you get my point?”

The silence following Jongin’s words felt like hours, when in reality it was probably only a few seconds, until Kyungsoo’s glare went to his knees and tears started falling from his eyes. It was the first time in quite a while Jongin had seen anyone cry, but as his neighbour’s cries went from small sobs to louder wails he decided that he had to do something, so he pulled Kyungsoo into a hug, holding the shorter boy toward his chest, allowing him to let out his emotions freely. He didn’t really know what to say, he didn’t know what Kyungsoo needed to hear to be happy again, he wanted to say something along the lines of ‘don’t cry’, but that didn’t sound right, it made it sound like he wanted the other boy to stop crying, which was partly true, but more than just not crying he wanted Kyungsoo to not be sad. “It’s going to be okay,” he said instead, feeling like the biggest idiot in the world for using a cliché phrase like that.

“No it’s not,” Kyungsoo protested, “it’s never going to be okay, my mum and brother are never going to have time for me like they did before.”

“Even if things change,” Jongin mumbled, still completely out of ideas of how to fix the situation, “your mum will still love you like she did before,” he didn’t know shit about Kyungsoo’s family, his mother could be an abusive bitch and he would have no idea, “that’s why you’re crying now, right? Because your family members are busy these days?”

Nodding slowly, Kyungsoo wiped his tear-stained cheeks as he pulled himself out of Jongin’s embrace, his eyes red from crying, “because my mum and brother have changed their behaviour toward me, because my glasses are broken so I can’t read for shit which makes me fail half my classes, because everyone annoys me and I can’t do anything about it. Nothing is right.”

 _What do I say, what do I say, what do I say?_ Jongin opened his mouth but it took him a few seconds to actually get the words out, “people are different. You’re more reserved; people like Chanyeol and Baekhyun don’t function well with you because they’re extroverted, that’s why they match each other better instead. I’m sure your mum will get to fix your glasses soon, if not then I’ll get my mum to drive us to Busan so you can get them fixed by yourself, we can’t have you failing all your classes because your mum is a little busy.”

“Were you telling me the truth when you told me you were gay?” Kyungsoo changed the subject like the conversation they were having just a second ago wasn’t important anymore.

“Of course, were you?” Jongin decided to let the other boy control the conversation, after all he probably needed a little recreation after crying like that.

“Mhm,” Kyungsoo’s gaze went straight to Jongin’s eyes and he felt his heart beating faster, the shorter boy’s eyes were a work of art, they were huge, a beautiful shade of brown, it were eyes like these romance novelists described as ‘eyes you could drown in’, “what if I told you that I liked you?”

Jongin’s jaw dropped as he mentally reminded himself to thank God when he got home later that evening, “I’d tell you that,” he felt his throat go dry, “I’d tell you that I like you too.”

What happened next had to be one for the history books; Kyungsoo slowly moved to his left, placing himself on Jongin’s thighs, only to lean forward and kiss him. At first Jongin was too shocked to kiss back, the soft, satisfying feel of the shorter boy’s lips on his confused him too much, the sweet taste of carrot cake still lingering in the kiss. Then came the tongue, Jongin thought he was going to faint at the spot, but then he got himself together and decided that this might be his only chance to truly win Kyungsoo’s heart; he had to go all in.

When Kyungsoo finally pulled back he had the biggest smirk on his face, “nice.”

“You don’t say.”

They both laughed, all sadness from minutes ago appearing to be forgotten, “I don’t even know what you actually look like,” Kyungsoo rested his head on Jongin’s shoulder, “that’s how blind I am without glasses, you’re nothing but a blurry mess.”

“Personally I’d say I look pretty good.” He earned a slap from Kyungsoo, “I’m not lying! Once we get your glasses fixed you’ll agree.”

The laughter returned, Jongin was confused like he’d never been confused before by the current events but he couldn’t really bring himself to care when Kyungsoo’s face was just centimetres from his own, “I heard from Sehun that you dance,” Kyungsoo mumbled, “so there’s this thing I’ve always wanted to try.”

“I’m listening.”

“We have an old turntable and my mum has a lot of cheesy music, so maybe if I put on one of those songs you’ll teach me how to slow dance.”

Jongin couldn’t reply at firs; then he said the dumbest thing he could possibly say, “won’t it wake up your mum and brother?”

Kyungsoo shook his head, “no they’re heavy sleepers, also it’s just one song.”

“Of course.”

Kyungsoo quickly put the music on, grabbing Jongin’s hand as the tunes started playing, it was a slow RnB track, Jongin didn’t know the name but he liked it nonetheless (or perhaps he just liked the feeling of being this close to Kyungsoo, chests and thighs pressed against each other). There wasn’t really a lot of actual dancing involved, it was more just the two boys swaying from side to side, Kyungsoo hiding his face in Jongin’s shirt to not reveal how red his cheeks had gotten, Jongin constantly biting his lower lip to not let out squeals of excitement. When the song was almost done and they had slow danced for roughly three minutes, Kyungsoo tip-toed to yet again press his lips against Jongin’s, leading the taller boy’s hands to his waist, “thank you.”

His raging hormones made it hard for Jongin to hold back, especially with his hands wrapped around Kyungsoo like this, “do you want to go with me back to my place?”

“Mhm.”

Another kiss, “good.”

“I’ll say goodbye to my mum first, give me a second,” Kyungsoo looked down on his knees, “and I’ll get some pants on too.”

Jongin had completely forgotten about the shattered window and the broken door, so he nearly got a heart attack when they went back to the entrance of the house, “I’m not trying to snoop into your private life, but seriously what happened here?”

“It’s a long, long story,” Kyungsoo mumbled, “don’t worry nothing bad happened. My mum is calm about it; we’ll get it fixed soon.”

 

They held hands on their short way back to Jongin’s house. Everything felt somewhat surreal; they’d known each other for what? Three days? These relationship-things weren’t supposed to happen so fast, Jongin could however not bring himself to care much. “We need to whisper when we get inside,” he told Kyungsoo as he unlocked the front door, the time was way past 10 PM and his parents had probably gone to sleep already, well-knowing that Jongin was old enough to get home safely, “my parents aren’t as good at sleeping as your mum.” He meant it as a joke, but Kyungsoo didn’t laugh, instead his facial expression immediately turned rather sad, Jongin was so tired of constantly fucking up, “I’m so sorry, that’s not what I meant, God damn it you just told me how you felt about that.”

Kyungsoo squeezed his hand as some kind of way of saying ‘it’s okay’, “I never got to thank you properly for the cake by the way, it was great. I don’t have time to bake much so we rarely eat cake.”

Jongin felt extremely satisfied knowing that he’d succeeded in making Kyungsoo happy, even if his comment from two seconds ago kind of ruined it, “did you bring your toothbrush? The bathroom is right outside my room.”

“Of course I did. Is your mum okay with me being here?” Kyungsoo whispered as they slowly walked upstairs, trying not to wake up anyone, “don’t you think she’ll be shocked tomorrow when she finds me sleeping in your room?”

“Nah,” Jongin brushed it off, “she’s very loose about stuff like that, she’s probably just happy I have good friends.”

“Friends?”   
Jongin nearly choked on his own spit, “uh well, yeah I-“

“I’m just kidding, the term ‘boyfriend’ is a little heavy to use when we’ve known each other for such a short time and only have kissed once or twice. What bothers me the most is probably that your brother was kind of right when he teased us that day at the dinner table.”

For the hundredth time that evening Jongin found himself blushing, they now stood in the bathroom with toothbrushes in their hands, their arms and legs touching since the bathroom was too small for them to stand further away from each other, “I like the word boyfriend.”

Kyungsoo turned his head so they could lock eyes, “then I give you official permission to use it.”

“Thank you.”

 

Jongin’s bed was rather tiny for two people, not that he minded because it resulted in the two of them spooning; Jongin’s arms wrapped around Kyungsoo’s waist, his head nuzzled against the other boy’s neck, their breathing calmly slowing down as they fell into a deep slumber, all problems from the world disappearing for a little while.

A conspicuous thing Jongin couldn’t really get his mind off was how thin Kyungsoo’s body felt against his own, he could easily feel the smaller boy’s ribcage, as well as his spine sticking out and being very visible through his white t-shirt. He was way too skinny for a teenage boy around their age, and even though Kyungsoo had excused his obvious lack of nutrition by having to do all the cooking at home by himself, Jongin felt like it was a problem he couldn’t overlook, “Kyungsoo.”

“Yeah?”

“I’m sorry for waking you up.”

Kyungsoo smiled as he turned around, placing his right leg on top of Jongin’s, “it’s okay, what is it?”

“Are you sure you’re eating enough food at home?”

“Are you in the name of all that is holy asking me that at this hour? Goodnight Jongin.”

“No wait,” Jongin sighed as his hand ran through Kyungsoo’s hair, “it’s just, I want to make sure you remember to eat breakfast every day as well as real dinner. You’re always welcome to eat here if you’re too busy to cook for yourself.”

Kyungsoo shook his head, “I don’t just cook for myself, there are my mum and brother too; they need food as well.”

Jongin had completely forgotten, every time he’d been at Kyungsoo’s house his family were fast asleep, making him erase their existence from his mind, “I’m sure they’re welcome every once in a while too, they need to eat well just like you, we can’t have all three of you starving because you’re busy with school or work.”

The sound of heavy breaths told Jongin that his boyfriend had gone back to sleep, leaving him alone with his thoughts again. After staring blankly at the ceiling for a few minutes he recalled the sight of Kyungsoo’s front door being kicked in, how in the world did something like that happen? And why did Kyungsoo talk about it like it didn’t mean anything? Usually doors weren’t kicked in unless some kind of intruder was involved, but it didn’t seem like that was the case at all. Jongin thought back on that morning in the bus where Kyungsoo’s uniform was blood stained, that was very suspicious (and slightly scary) too. Where did the blood come from? Was it his own? Did someone beat him up? Maybe the same person who kicked in the front door and shattered the window? Could it be his mother? Jongin didn’t think so; she was sleeping all the time when she was home and working all the time when she was out. She couldn’t have enough time free to abuse her son. What if Kyungsoo didn’t have a mother and him and his brother lived alone? That explained why basic stuff like cleaning and fixing Kyungsoo’s glasses weren’t done properly; Kyungsoo’s glasses!

Jongin let out a deep sigh, what kind of parent let their child walk around nearly blind because she was too “busy” to buy him a new pair of specs? It didn’t make any sense; when he thought more about it, alone her rejection of her child (well, if she existed) was extreme enough to be labelled as ‘abuse’. He looked at the sleeping boy beside him; Kyungsoo’s mum had to be real. He’d heard him mention her when he had loudly argued with his brother that day Jongin went to walk his dogs and passed their house. Kyungsoo also always said goodbye to his mother and talked about how he took care of her; there was something that was completely off about Kyungsoo’s family dynamic and domestic life, but Jongin was way too terrified to mention it.

He just wanted Kyungsoo to be happy whilst living a peaceful, normal life.


	4. Playing Hide and Seek

Kyungsoo was gone when Jongin woke up the next morning, he didn’t remember being awake when the other boy left, so he didn’t have any idea about how much time that had passed since his neighbour went back home. He slowly sat up and found a note lying on his nightstand, he hadn’t exchanged phone numbers with Kyungsoo yet, so leaving a handwritten note was probably the only way of informing Jongin about his leave without waking him up.

 

_I went home to check up on my mum, I’ll see you at school - Kyungsoo_

 

Jongin frowned, putting the paper back on the table, why did Kyungsoo need to check up on his mum? According to the other boy she didn’t have any illnesses, she just worked a lot; maybe he had to wake her up so she wouldn’t be late for work? That wasn’t completely unrealistic.

He spotted his own mum in the kitchen as he walked downstairs, “did you see Kyungsoo leave earlier?”

She nodded, “yeah he left about thirty minutes ago, he told me he notified you already and that there was no need for me to wake you up. Did the two of you have fun yesterday?”

“Mum we didn’t-“

“Have sex?” She laughed as she placed a bowl of rice in front of him, “of course you didn’t have sex; I just wanted to know if the two of you had a good time, completely platonic.”

Hiding his face in his hands, Jongin muttered out a reply, “yeah it was great. Stop asking me about it.”

“You’re such a teenager.”

“ _Mum_ ,” he let out a groan, suddenly very thankful that Kyungsoo wasn’t present, that’d be too much to bear.   
Before leaving the house he considered going to Kyungsoo’s house to make sure everything was okay, but since he was running late he eventually decided against it, a decision he’d later regret.

 

He should’ve been suspicious when Kyungsoo didn’t show up at the bus stop; there was no other way the boy could get to school than taking the bus, which meant that if he wasn’t on the bus he wasn’t going to school. Somehow Jongin still managed to erase all of that from his mind, convinced that his neighbour would show up at school anyway; something he (of course) didn’t do.

Sehun was the first one to talk to him when he arrived; “man what happened yesterday was crazy; Chanyeol even got into an argument with Baekhyun afterward about whether he should forgive Kyungsoo or not.”

“Is Chanyeol okay?” After the events at Kyungsoo’s house last night Jongin couldn’t feel too sorry for Chanyeol, but he still felt like it was only polite to ask.

Sehun nodded, “Chanyeol is absolutely fine, I wonder how he’s going to react when he sees Kyungsoo though, speaking of Kyungsoo, where the Hell is he? I didn’t think he could afford skipping more classes.”

Jongin shrugged, “I don’t know. I spoke to him yesterday, hearing everything from his point of view was very interesting. I think we should be careful about labelling him as the crazy one.”

“You spoke to him yesterday, after school, in his house or on the bus?” Sehun wouldn’t stop with the questions as they sat down in their classroom.

“At his place,” Jongin leaned closer to Sehun to make sure no one could eavesdrop, “you’ve got to be completely quiet about this, don’t tell anyone, okay?”

“Of course.”

It wasn’t Jongin’s intention to tell anyone about Kyungsoo’s front door being kicked in or the shattered window, he didn’t want to spill the secrets of Kyungsoo’s mother and brother sleeping all the time, he didn’t even know whether Sehun was a person who could keep secrets or not, but the knowledge he’d gathered yesterday was too overwhelming to keep to himself, “apparently Kyungsoo’s having troubles these days because his mum works a lot more than she usually does, his brother is busy with school too, so Kyungsoo has to do all the housework at home, he cooks, cleans, does the dishes, all that.” He decided to start out with the less shocking revelations.

The other boy made a thoughtful face, “I suppose that’s kind of sad, but it’s not like he’s the only one in class with problems at home.”

Hopefully he was the only one in class with such severe issues, “I know, that’s not all either. He uses glasses apparently,” their eyes met and Sehun sent him a confirming nod, “but he hasn’t worn them recently because they broke or something like that, his mum is an optician and she said she’d fix them but she hasn’t because she’s too busy, so he’s walked around almost unable to see anything for I don’t know how long, that’s why his grades are so bad.”

“Are you serious?” Sehun’s mouth was agape, “I thought he just switched to contacts. I get where you’re coming from, but family issues don’t really justify him being rude toward Chanyeol, though I suppose it does explain why he’s so reserved.”

“There’s more.”

“There’s more?”

“Yeah. The first time I visited him the entire house was super dirty and there was this weird smell, I don’t know exactly how to describe it since I’ve never smelled anything like that before, but it wasn’t nice. I mean that somehow makes sense when he has to clean everything by himself, but then he also had those blood stains on his uniform.”

Sehun grimaced, “as if he wasn’t creepy enough already.”

“I tried to confront him about it but then he just asked me if I wanted to die. He also told me that I should just kill my own brother if he continued teasing me, that was pretty obscure,” Jongin was startled by the frightened mien on Sehun’s face, his friend rarely showed many emotions through expressions, “that scared me a lot too, honestly, but it didn’t get _really_ weird until yesterday.”

Shaking his head, Sehun turned away from Jongin, “dude I’m not too sure I want to hear it, I like to sleep at night.”

Jongin grabbed Sehun’s hand before he could move too far away, “no please hear me out,” he sighed in relief as Sehun sat down again, “okay so when I went to his house yesterday the front door was kicked in and one of the windows in the kitchen was shattered. The lights in the living room were out too, I asked him about it and he said his mum would fix it, just like he said she’d fix his glasses. I did my best to ignore it while I stayed at his place because he’s actually very nice and friendly once you get to know him, but I can’t help but wonder what the fuck is going on behind the scenes in that house.”

“I told you not to tell me more about it!” Sehun exclaimed, slapping Jongin’s arm in frustration, “I told you he was weird! Why did you have to become his best friend? I swear to God you should’ve stuck to me, Zitao, and Taemin.”

“What if his mum isn’t even home most of the time? He says she’s sleeping every time I’m at his house, what if in reality she doesn’t even have a job and she’s just an alcoholic who beats him up? I’m so concerned and I want to ask him about it but he scares me too much.” Jongin planted his face on his desk, “what do I do?”

Sehun sighed as well, “I don’t know. It’s weird that he isn’t at school today too.”

Jongin bit his lip, unsure of whether he should tell Sehun about his newfound romantic relationship with Kyungsoo or not, then he recalled his neighbour telling him about Sehun and Zitao having a love affair, so at least he wouldn’t get a homophobic reaction, “okay so the last thing I need to tell you. I kind of hooked up with Kyungsoo yesterday? Like we didn’t have sex but we kissed and we slow danced, it was super nice and-“

“You did what?!” Sehun screamed as he jumped up from his chair, slowly sitting down again and lowering his voice, “even after all those warning signs? Wait hold up, you didn’t even tell me you were gay!”

Jongin saw this as a great opportunity to use his secret weapon, “just like you didn’t tell me that you and Zitao have something going on,” he retorted.

Sehun gasped loudly, eyes flickering to Zitao who sat at his desk a few rows behind them, talking to some girl Jongin didn’t know the name of, “how in the name of Jesus do you know about that?” He didn’t even try to deny it.

“Kyungsoo told me, he apparently knows everything about everyone too; add that to the list of his scary features. But yeah, we kissed and all that. He also slept over at my house, but he was gone when I woke up in the morning, he said he had to go check on his mum. I have no idea what he meant by that.”

“’Neither do I,” Sehun confessed, still looking incredibly shocked (and offended) about Jongin’s knowledge of his relationship with Zitao, “but I know that I don’t want to have anything to do with Kyungsoo. He’s fucking scary and everything you just told me only convinced me more.”

 

Baekhyun (of all people) _obviously_ insisted on accompanying Jongin on the bus ride home because he wanted to visit Kyungsoo after school to make sure he was okay. Jongin tried to subtly give hints that it wasn’t a good idea by saying that he’d already talked to Kyungsoo and he knew that the other boy was fine, but Baekhyun was seemingly too stupid to take any hints and insisted on checking Kyungsoo personally.

Jongin followed Baekhyun to Kyungsoo’s house after getting out of the bus, the door was still kicked in, making Baekhyun give Jongin a questioning stare, he didn’t know what to say, “I’ll go home now,” Jongin took a step back, “I suppose you want to be alone with him.”

“Yeah,” Baekhyun looked like he was about to faint from anxiousness, “y-yeah I’ll go alone. Thank you Nini, really.”

Oh how Jongin hated that nickname, “no problem, say hi to Kyungsoo from me.”

“Will do.”

 

After spending an hour yawning at his homework, Jongin was snapped out of his thoughts by the sound of someone screaming and knocking on their front door. His mother, who was busy packing out her grocery bags, went to find out who in the world screamed like that. Jongin was sitting in the kitchen as well and slowly moved to the left so he could see who stood outside too.

It turned out to be Baekhyun who looked completely horrified, as if he’d just seen a ghost, “I-, I-,” he was unable to get out a full sentence as he grabbed onto Jongin’s mother for support.

“Baekhyun?” Jongin asked as he got up from his chair, “what happened?”

“You know this boy?” Jongin’s mother asked as she helped Baekhyun, who seemed to be limping, into the kitchen, she pulled out a chair for him to sit down as she turned to Jongin, “he’s from your school?”

Jongin nodded, “he’s a classmate.”

“He’s a psychopath!” Baekhyun yelled at Jongin who tried to calm him down by placing his hands on top of the trembling boy’s, “Kyungsoo’s a fucking psychopath I tell you!”

“Sweetie remember to breathe,” Jongin’s mother sat down in front of Baekhyun, cupping the teenager’s face with her hands, “you went to Kyungsoo’s house, that’s the boy living down the road’s name, right? He’s Jongin’s friend too, isn’t he?” Baekhyun tried to nod but was cut off by his own hiccupping, “okay now,”

Jongin’s mother continued, “you went to his house?” Baekhyun nodded, successfully this time, “did the two of you get into a fight? Is that why you’re limping?”

Baekhyun looked at Jongin for help, as if Jongin would have the answer to what his mother was asking, sure Kyungsoo’s house didn’t exactly appear ‘normal’, but it wasn’t something to freak out like this over, “Kyungsoo is okay, isn’t he?”

Baekhyun started wailing as he lowered his head to hide his tears, “h-he’s insane I tell you! I-insane! I just, I just wanted to see if he was all right because he wasn’t at school like I told you, b-but he, he,” he trailed off again as he shook his head, the words still not willing to leave his throat.

“Baekhyun, that was your name right?” Jongin’s mum placed her hand on Baekhyun’s shoulder for moral support, “what did Kyungsoo do to you? How did you get hurt?”

Jongin felt like he was going to throw up, he had only seen one expression on Baekhyun’s face in the time they’d known each other; cheerfulness. He didn’t even know the other boy was capable of looking like this, and it being because of Kyungsoo, something was off.

“H-he told me he’d kill me if I told anyone, and I just fell down the stairs, it’s nothing, I-I’m not hurt, I better go home,” Baekhyun looked at Jongin with tear stained eyes, “it’s insane I tell you.”

“We should call your parents, do you want me to do it for you? You have their number on your phone, right?” Jongin’s mother pulled out another chair, “here put your leg on this, if you got hurt we should probably find some ice for you. Can I borrow your phone to call your mum?”

Baekhyun shook his head, “no, he told me not to tell anyone, I should go home now.”

Jongin went to the freezer to find ice, “Baekhyun your house is far away, you can barely walk already, that’d just be stupid.” Keeping calm wasn’t exactly easy, _he told me he’d kill me if I told anyone_ , Kyungsoo had mentioned ‘killing’ quite often within the few days the two boys had known each other, but he must’ve sounded very serious this time for Baekhyun to be this shaken from the experience. What in the world had Kyungsoo done to him? If they’d gotten into a fight and he’d threatened Baekhyun by saying he wanted to kill him it kind of made sense to be scared, but not to this extend. Baekhyun looked like his soul had left his body as he handed Jongin’s mum his phone.

“Where did you get hurt?” Jongin asked, sitting down next to the frightened boy, “don’t look like you’re freaked out by the sign of me too, I’m the last person on earth who’s going to hurt you.”

“I told you already, I’m not hurt,” Baekhyun wiped his tears away with the palm of his hand, hiding his eyes from Jongin’s glare, “I’m scared Jongin.”

Jongin sighed, “I can see that, listen if you’re not going to tell me ‘neither where you got hurt nor what Kyungsoo did to leave you in this mental state I won’t be able to help you. You told us that you fell down the stairs, which sounds like getting hurt to me.”

Baekhyun rolled up his pants, revealing a bruised knee, “It’s nothing, it’ll be over tomorrow, l-let me go home now, please. I don’t like being this close to-“

“To Kyungsoo?”

“Y-yeah.”

They didn’t get to talk more before Jongin’s mother gave Baekhyun back his phone, “your parents are on their way, I suggest you tell them all that happened even though Kyungsoo told you not to. That’s a sign of bullying, are you aware of that? It’s common blackmailing to use threats like that to make others keep quiet about certain events. You need to get adults involved,” she looked at Jongin, “and we need to talk about your relationship with Kyungsoo afterward as well.”

 

Keeping Baekhyun somewhat calm until his parents arrived was a hard task; he wouldn’t stop crying and continued to refuse whenever they asked him to tell what happened at Kyungsoo’s house. Even when his parents finally arrived to pick him up he didn’t let out a word, instead he just silently thanked Jongin and his mother by giving them a bow before following his parents to their car.

“Sit down,” Jongin’s mum commanded when the other boy had left their house, “we need to talk about what’s going on with your classmates.”

Jongin held his breath as he took a seat across his mother at their dinner table, “I swear to God and all that is holy, I have no idea about what scared Baekhyun like that. As you clearly saw last night nothing about Kyungsoo or his house scared me. I don’t know what happened between them.”

“Can we however agree on the fact that threatening to kill someone if they don’t keep their mouth shut is wrong on so many levels?”

His mother did not sound amused, Jongin didn’t dare to argue with her, “yes.”

“Listen if you’re keeping any secrets from me because Kyungsoo told you to then I’m going to make you regret it.”

Her tone was intimidating, Jongin was almost uneasy about just looking at her, “I promise you I’m _not_ keeping anything from you.” That wasn’t entirely true, he hadn’t told her about the broken window, the door that was kicked in, the electricity that didn’t work, the blood stains on his uniform, Kyungsoo’s mother’s rejection of her own son, to be honest there were many things he kept from her, a wave of guilt suddenly overwhelming him, “w-well okay that’s not…”

“Kim Jongin what are you not telling me?”

She raised her eyebrows, he hated it when she did that, “w-well Kyungsoo’s temper is very bad because he has a troubled relationship with his mum, she isn’t taking care of him well, not in my opinion at least, but I feel like it’s not polite to snoop into other people’s personal lives like that.”

“In what ways is she not taking care of him well? If he’s being abused at home it’s only common sense to not be quiet about it.”

Jongin immediately shook his head, “I don’t know any details! That’s why I kept quiet about it, I barely know anything about what goes on behind closed doors,” well technically Kyungsoo’s door couldn’t be closed, “m-maybe Kyungsoo just snapped at Baekhyun, the two of them aren’t exactly best friends, uh, I think Baekhyun thinks that they’re very close, but it’s obvious that Kyungsoo doesn’t like him very much. There is a chance Baekhyun said something that made Kyungsoo take out all his rage on him; then he could’ve regretted it and told Baekhyun he’d kill him if he told anyone. Kyungsoo often makes jokes like ‘do you want to die?’.”

His mother was quiet for a while, “I think you should go and check up on Kyungsoo by yourself, but bring your phone and _promise_ me to call me instantly if anything bad happens, is that a deal?”

“Yeah, pinky promise.”

 

His heart was beating so fast he was afraid it’d eventually break his ribs, Jongin felt cold sweat on his neck, he tried to take a deep breath to collect himself before stopping in front of Kyungsoo’s house. As usual there were no lights on, the door was (just like earlier that day) kicked in, only this time there wasn’t even the usual buzz from the TV to give away any signs of life. “H-hello?” Jongin felt his stomach twisting and turning in a million different directions, making him afraid he’d eventually pass out, “Kyungsoo? It’s me Jongin. Baekhyun went home; you don’t need to be angry anymore.”

Silence.

“Kyungsoo?” He tried again, letting out a very embarrassing squeal as he felt the floor creak underneath him, “a-are you upstairs?” He turned on the flashlight on his phone, knowing very well by now that not a single lamp in the house worked properly. It suddenly hit him that he’d never been upstairs before. Upstairs was where the bedrooms were, which meant it would also be where Kyungsoo’s mother and brother were asleep, if they were home (or real) of course. He grimaced as the weird odour from his previous visits returned, in that moment realisation struck and he recognised the smell. He took a step back in disgust, tightening his grip around his phone in fear that he might drop it from shaking too much, going upstairs didn’t seem like such a good idea any longer, not when his brain finally had remembered the smell; rotten meat. He knew because back when he was eleven he’d been on a camping trip out in the woods with his classmates and they’d stumbled upon the bodies of two dead dogs near their camp. The smell from back then was _a lot_ stronger and more disgusting than the one in Kyungsoo’s house, but it was no doubt in the same category of smell (could you even say that?) and Jongin didn’t like it at all. When he’d first visited Kyungsoo he’d immediately realised that the smell didn’t belong in a house, and now he knew why.

A feel of nausea suddenly hit him and he ran to the kitchen to throw up in the sink. What if it was this smell that had freaked Baekhyun out like that? It would make great sense, with the exception of Kyungsoo telling Baekhyun to keep whatever had happened as a secret. Could there be the body of a dead animal upstairs? Jongin felt even sicker at the thought. Quickly cleaning his mouth with water from the tap he decided to go upstairs, hopefully his encounter with Kyungsoo would be a whole lot less scary than Baekhyun’s.

Walking up the stairs took an awfully long time, each step let out a creek, Jongin tried to make the sound as quiet as possible, but it only got louder every time he sat down his foot. _Please let the house be empty_ , he found himself praying as he reached the top of the stairs, the second floor being right in front of him, _what have you gotten yourself into?_ He considered turning around and run home without ever looking back, looking down the staircase only scared him even more, was this where Baekhyun had fallen down? What if Kyungsoo had pushed him? He took another deep breath to clear his mind but it barely worked, he was still frightened as ever. The floor consisted of a long hallway with three doors, now which of these doors were the doors to Kyungsoo’s bedroom? Jongin was too scared to call out any names; he wasn’t risking accidently waking up Kyungsoo’s mother and brother too. The first door on his right had the letters ‘Seungsoo’ written on it with a blue pen, Jongin figured out that must be Kyungsoo’s brother’s name and room, and therefore not a door he was going to open.

The next door fortunately had Kyungsoo’s name on it, Jongin found himself sighing in relief for the first time since entering his neighbour’s house, the relief was however soon to disappear when the room turned out to be empty. He took this as an opportunity to explore it for a little while; he’d never been here before even though Kyungsoo had been in his room _twice,_ so a part of him felt like it was only fair. The walls were full of different posters, most of them were movie or musical posters, but Jongin noticed a Zac Efron poster in the midst of the rest, he’d have to confront Kyungsoo about that sooner or later. The room was smaller than Jongin’s, but it wouldn’t be considered ‘small’ by the average Korean room standard (whatever that was, Jongin would at least not call it small), the bed was same size as Jongin’s, it was nicely made with silky white bed sheets, the room in general was surprisingly clean, not a hint of dust to be found anywhere, which was very contradicting to the rest of the house. The room smelled very nice too, it was in all honesty the only room in the house that seemed to have been used by anyone for weeks. There was a chance Seungsoo’s room looked like that too, but Jongin had obviously not looked.

The room however missed one thing; Kyungsoo himself. It was with a disappointed look on his face Jongin left the room again to continue his quest.

The last door had no letters written on it, Jongin guessed it must belong to Kyungsoo’s mum. Maybe the house was empty after all. Then he heard a cough coming from behind the door, a cough that could belong to no one but Kyungsoo. It was way too deep to belong to a woman and Jongin swore he’d heard Kyungsoo cough just like that a few days ago. With butterflies in his stomach (he wasn’t really sure what exactly he felt at that very moment) he opened the door.

And oh how he was not prepared for what he saw.

The rotten odour was now even stronger than it’d been back in the woods all those years ago, making Jongin’s hand fly to his face to protect himself from the smell, he nearly dropped his phone in the process, but he managed to direct the light toward the bed where Kyungsoo was sleeping next to a woman Jongin supposed was his mother.

She didn’t look normal. Something about her face was wrong. Her skin looked grey, not the usual pale skin tone women got after applying too much BB cream, but a lifeless tone of white. Her mouth was slightly agape, but there was no sound of breathing.

Her eyes weren’t closed.

Jongin let out a howling scream.

Kyungsoo’s mother was dead.


	5. A Minute Too Late

Kyungsoo’s eyes flew right open, his stare immediately wandering to Jongin who fell backward in surprise and horror. If he felt sick in the kitchen a few minutes ago he was ready to admit himself to a hospital now.

“Y-you,” he pointed at Kyungsoo’s mother, but he didn’t get to finish his sentence before the other boy pulled him into a headlock, his arms were a lot stronger than they looked, no wonder Kyungsoo had been able to fight Chanyeol. Jongin tried to call for help, but no words were able to leave his mouth with the shorter boy’s grip only tightening with each second, “K-Kyungsoo,” he croaked out, feeling the blood drain from his face, “let go,” the words came out as a whisper, “it’s Jongin, _let go_.”

On command, Kyungsoo took a step back, his hands curled into fists, obviously trying to calm himself down, “leave.”

Jongin’s eyes went back to Kyungsoo’s mother’s body lying on the bed, the nausea immediately returned and he leaned forward as he threw up all over the bedroom floor.

“Don’t tell anyone about this, if you do I’ll kill you. Now leave before we wake up my mum.” He looked so serious, it was hard to tell if he believed his own words or not. If Kyungsoo knew that his mother was dead then why would he tell Jongin to not wake her up? But if he for some reason didn’t know that she was dead then why would he tell Jongin to not tell anyone? “Jongin I told you to leave.”

Their eyes met for what felt like more than a minute, the entire universe seemed empty, quiet, dead. The only two people left in the world were Jongin and Kyungsoo, staring at each other, standing in the same room as Kyungsoo’s mother’s corpse. “She’s dead,” Jongin suddenly said; as usual he only realised how uncalled for his comments were after they’d left his mouth.

Kyungsoo didn’t answer at first, then he opened his mouth (probably to say something) but seemingly decided against it, because instead of giving Jongin an actual reply, he started screaming and shouting instead; in Jongin’s ears it didn’t sound like a single actual sentence left the other boy, it was purely angry frustrated roars. He pulled Jongin up from his crouching position on the floor, dragged him out of the room and toward the staircase, “get out!” He yelled again before shoving Jongin down the stairs, “who do you think you are? Showing up here without an invitation, walking upstairs, you knew my mother and brother would be sleeping! Did you disturb Seungsoo too? You just had to, didn’t you?” After running down the stairs he punched Jongin in the face, the taller boy didn’t even react, “first Baekhyun now you,” Kyungsoo’s voice cracked mid-sentence and he turned away to hide his tears, “leave now, don’t tell anyone. I-I’ll kill you if you tell anyone, even if it’s your mum, I-I mean it, you’re d-dead.”

Never had Jongin empathised with another person as much as he empathised with Baekhyun right now.

 

The first five steps he took leaving Kyungsoo’s house had been slow, he needed to fully comprehend what had just happened to him, the pictures of Kyungsoo’s mum lying in bed with her eyes wide open were fresh in his mind; he doubted he’d ever be able to forget it. Similar was the feeling of Kyungsoo’s ice cold hands on his neck, an expression of pure rage painted on the boy’s face as he dragged Jongin downstairs whilst screaming for him to get out. _Did you disturb Seungsoo too?_ Shivers ran down Jongin’s spine at the thought of Kyungsoo’s brother being dead as well.

It explained a lot though; it explained everything. The glasses that weren’t fixed, Kyungsoo being the only one left to cook and clean the house, his mother and brother sleeping all the time, the door being kicked in.

Jongin quickly turned around to eye the entrance of the house, had Kyungsoo kicked in the door by himself in order to get inside after forgetting the key? That afternoon where he told Jongin he’d just call his mum and he heard the window shatter, did he first break the window to get inside but then decided to kick in the door later for practical reasons?

For how long had Kyungsoo’s family been dead? Fortunately, Jongin didn’t know anything about how fast a body decomposed or how it was supposed to look after a certain period of time.  It couldn’t have been too long, could it? She still looked somewhat human to him.

The graphic images of the corpse made him move his legs faster, he needed to get home. Jongin felt hot tears in his eyes as he started running, not knowing exactly how to describe which emotions he felt. He was scared, that was obvious to him too, but he was also incredibly sad, he wasn’t sure if it was because he felt sorry for Kyungsoo or because he felt disgusted with himself for being in a house with a dead person in it.

The cold wind quickly dried his tears as he ran, so his physical appearance didn’t give away the horror he was experiencing mentally as he stepped inside his own house. “Mum?” He wanted to scream for her at the top of his lungs, not willing to spend another second alone, “mum?!” He yelled a bit louder this time and soon his mother stood in front of him.

“Honey what’s wrong?” She immediately pulled him into a hug, she probably wanted to comfort him, but it didn’t work right now, he was too distraught by his own thoughts and the images of Kyungsoo’s dead mother still haunting his mind.

“They’re dead!” He cried out, what felt like a flood of tears falling from his eyes, “Kyungsoo’s mum is dead, I t-think his brother is too, that’s what Baekhyun saw, t-that’s why he acted l-like that.” _I’m going to kill you_ , Kyungsoo’s warning was also fresh in his mind, but just thinking of what he’d just experienced tore Jongin too much apart for him to not tell anyone.

His own mother looked completely baffled, “deep breaths, Jongin look at me.” Their eyes met, he could barely see her in the blurry mess his tears had left his eyesight in, “you do _not_ joke around about things like this okay. If this is true we’ll have to get the police involved immediately. If this is some kind of sick joke between you and your friends this is your last chance to tell me. I’m going to ground you for the rest of your life if you’re lying to me about a topic like this.”

He only cried harder, “I s-swear to God I’m telling you the truth. I found,” he took a deep breath in order to somehow continue his sentence, “I found him lying in bed n-next to his mum, y-you know I thought, I thought,” his mother gave him a worried look, on one hand she looked like she didn’t believe him at all, on the other hand she looked absolutely horrified at the thought of Jongin’s words being true, “I thought they were just s-sleeping!” He exclaimed, drying his eyes with the back of his hand, “but her eyes were open, she was dead, everyone who saw her lying there would know the moment they see…” he trailed off, resting his cheek on his mother’s shoulder, he’d been taller than her for a while, something he loved to remind her of to tease her, but not something that came in handy when he needed to be comforted.

“Jongin I understand that this must be incredibly traumatic for you, and I definitely understand why your friend who came here earlier freaked out like he did, but I need you to take a seat by the kitchen table and _stay there_ while I call the police, is that a deal?”

“D-deal,” as soon as he sat down Jongin regretted telling his mother what he just did. Guilt hitting him like a truck on a highway, completely paralysing him, keeping him away from thinking clear thoughts. He needed to go back to Kyungsoo’s house, he needed to tell Kyungsoo that the police were on their way; Kyungsoo had to know about this. He looked up and noticed that his mother was already speaking on the phone (probably to the police) with her back turned to Jongin, he therefore saw an opportunity to quickly get out of the house and prepare Kyungsoo for what was about to happen; they were boyfriends after all, Kyungsoo couldn’t have been serious when he threatened to kill him, there was no way.

If his mother noticed that he left the house it was already too late because he was out of the door before he heard her say or yell anything. He ran faster than he remembered being able to, he didn’t know what had changed his mind and made him regret telling his mother, he didn’t know why the guilt wouldn’t get out of his system; he _knew_ the police had to be involved, Kyungsoo couldn’t live alone with his mother’s corpse rotting upstairs. On the other hand Jongin also knew that he’d crossed all boundaries when he decided to tell his mum, he’d broken the trust and faith Kyungsoo had put in him.

“Kyungsoo!” He shouted as he made his way across the door, “Kyungsoo I need to talk to you, it has to be right now!” He was about to run upstairs when Kyungsoo appeared at the top of the stairway, holding a lighter in his right hand as a source of light, “I told my mum,” Jongin confessed, taking a step back as a devilish expression formed on the shorter boy’s face, “she called the police, I think they’re on their way.”

Just like earlier that day Kyungsoo threw himself at Jongin, turning off the lighter and running down the stairs faster than what seemed possible, only this time his punches were with way more force, the look in his eyes almost murderous. Jongin’s only advantage was his clear eyesight, but other than that it was obvious that Kyungsoo was used to physical fights; Jongin had never been in one before. Several times did he try to tell the shorter boy to stop hitting him, but his strength only grew from every time he was told to let go.

Jongin felt a kick to his stomach and out of pure reflex he grabbed Kyungsoo by the collar and shoved him into the wall using all strength he had left before they both collapsed on the floor in exhaustion, Kyungsoo’s hand still in a tight grip around Jongin’s wrist.

“Listen, I’m sorry,” Jongin croaked, sniffling as he tried to hold back his tears, “I did it for you, l-look at how you live. Also, doesn’t your mum deserve a funeral?”

Kyungsoo didn’t answer, Jongin didn’t dare to look at him.

“It was really n-never my intention t-to break the trust you’ve put in me, I’m so sorry.”

 

They stayed like that for what felt like forever, lying on the cold floor in Kyungsoo’s living room, said boy’s hand not leaving Jongin’s wrist for as much as a second.

After what was most likely closer to being a minute or two, Jongin’s mother came to the house along with the police, her facial expression showing a mix of anger, worry, and sadness, as if she couldn’t choose which one of them to fully portray.

The second one of the police officers approached the two boys lying on the floor, Kyungsoo immediately stood up and jerked away, had he never been drained from energy at all, “get out!” He yelled, exactly like he yelled at Jongin earlier, probably like he’d yelled at Baekhyun too, “I’ll kill you, all of you, I’m serious! Get out of he-“ he was stopped mid-sentence as he was dragged to the side by another policeman, who obviously was a whole lot stronger than Kyungsoo, “let me go! You can’t do this! You can’t do this!” The words sent uncomfortable chills down Jongin’s spine as he hid behind his mum, suddenly feeling very small.

“Where did you say the bodies were?” A man turned to Jongin.

He reconsidered answering, “u-upstairs.”

“No!” Kyungsoo was still struggling to free himself from the police officer’s grip, but there was no hope. He sent Jongin a mad glare, “don’t go upstairs!” He shouted again, even though it was by now clear to everyone that it was no use, “you’ll wake them up, don’t go upstairs!”

It only took the policemen a few minutes upstairs before they went back down, nodding in confirmation at the officer who was still holding Kyungsoo, “they’re definitely dead, both the brother and the mother, seemingly from choking, but we’ll have to call the paramedics.”

“Let’s take both boys to the police station,” the officer looked at Jongin’s mother, “we’d prefer if you went too.”

Everything happened way too fast, it was impossible for Jongin to think clearly, his mind constantly distracted by Kyungsoo’s screaming as the policemen dragged him out of the house. It was hard to believe that they’d slow danced in the very same living room yesterday; it now seemed like ages ago. _They’re definitely dead, both the brother and the mother, seemingly from choking_. Jongin felt himself hyperventilating as he recalled the image of the dead mother in his mind; despite the lights being dim it had still been way too graphic for him. The image of Seungsoo, who in Jongin’s mind looked very similar to Kyungsoo, being dead didn’t make him feel any better. He would probably have thrown up again if only his stomach wasn’t empty already.

 _Seemingly from choking_. The words were stuck in his head, who had choked Kyungsoo’s family members to death? Could it have been Kyungsoo’s father before he left? Perhaps an intruder, someone Kyungsoo’s mother might have had a secret affair with? Kyungsoo himself?

Jongin stopped walking for a second; did Kyungsoo choke his own mother and brother to death? The thoughts and images it brought were too disturbing for him to handle, he felt incredibly nauseous again, like he was about to faint.

“Is everything all right?” He heard his own mother’s voice coming from his left, he could only shake his head.

“I don’t feel too well,” he forced his legs to move as she pulled an arm around his waist for support, “I want to go home instead.”

“The faster we go to the police station and answer whatever questions they might have for us, the faster we’ll be home again, okay?”

“O-okay.”

 

He kept a significant distance from his mother in the car, he felt incredibly unwell but he couldn’t tell if it was because of car sickness or because of everything that had just happened in Kyungsoo’s house. It seemed a lot like his mother didn’t know exactly what to feel about the situation either, because she too kept quiet for most of the ride. “I think I understand why that Baekhyun boy from your class reacted the way he did,” she mumbled after a while, probably to ease the atmosphere a bit, “I’m so sorry.”

“I just don’t know how to feel about it,” Jongin replied, it was half a lie, he definitely did know how he felt about the situation; he was disgusted, scared, confused. He did however not know how he felt about Kyungsoo. It was impossible for him to feel disgusted with his boyfriend, even though a part of his brain told him that disgust was exactly what he should feel.

They arrived at the police station and were taken inside too fast for Jongin to spot Kyungsoo anywhere, admittedly the last thing he wanted to do right now was to be questioned by an officer who’d just end up bringing the horrid images of dead bodies back to Jongin’s mind.

“If you need any kind of psychological counselling after the incident,” the police officer who sat across Jongin and his mum was rather young and spoke in a tone which indicated that he was more interested in going home than Jongin’s mental well-being, “then I strongly suggest you seek a psychiatrist at the hospital instead of a normal psychologist, they’re usually better at dealing with such post-traumatic stress issues than private therapists. In the end it’s up to you of course, but I hope you’re not afraid of asking for professional help if you feel like you need it. What you saw must’ve been very scary.” His monotone voice made it very difficult to actually listen to what he said so Jongin allowed his mind to drift off after he’d finished answering most of the questions. Most of them were extremely repetitive anyway, “what can you tell us about Do Kyungsoo?”, “for how long have you known each other?”, “was he ever violent with you?”, “when did you first discover the dead bodies again?” it quickly became extremely uncomfortable.

He wasn’t really feeling fresh enough to think of what would happen from now on, it probably depended on what Kyungsoo told the police. At the age of 17 he was old enough to be held criminally responsible for his actions if he turned out to be the one who killed his mother (and brother), what would the police do with him if he admitted to being guilty? Would they put him in jail, in a mental institution? Jongin didn’t like ‘neither of the possibilities.

A scream from the room next door cut off his internal monologue, “what’s going on?” He hadn’t intended to say anything out loud, but the words escaped his lips before he noticed it.

_“I didn’t do it on purpose! I had no choice! You would’ve done the same if you were there!”_

Jongin had expected the walls to be more soundproof, but Kyungsoo’s yells could apparently not be stopped by anything. The words reminded him of what he’d heard weeks back when he walked Monggu and had stopped by his neighbour’s house, _I told you I didn’t mean to do it! Stop looking at me like I did it on purpose! If you didn’t tease me like that I would’ve left you alone!_

In the newfound context the words made it sound a whole lot like it was Kyungsoo who’d killed off his entire family and that his brain had yet to comprehend the fact that his mother and brother were dead. Jongin wanted to scream but chose to cover his ears instead, he couldn’t listen anymore. He felt his mother pull him into a hug, he knew she did it to comfort him but the sudden touch only made him feel even more uncomfortable and he immediately flinched, walking toward the door, he had to leave this place.

“Jongin sweetie it’s okay,” his mother reassured him as the police officer was quick to block the door, “we know that it’s an uncomfortable situation-“

“What are they going to do with him?” Jongin interrupted her mid-sentence.

“What are they going to do with whom?”

“With Kyungsoo,” he mumbled, “when he admits to being guilty.”

The police officer grabbed Jongin’s shoulders and dragged him back to his chair, “you mean what we’re going to do with him _if_ he admits to being guilty.”

 _But I now know that he is_ , Jongin didn’t tell the officer that Kyungsoo being the mastermind behind it all was most likely the only reasonable explanation and that Kyungsoo’s screams had obviously given it all away, “okay then, _if_ he admits to killing his family,” he looked at the floor, “what are you going to do with him? He’s too young to go to jail, he won’t be able to live in prison.”

“Technically,” the police officer replied sternly, “he’s very much old enough to go to jail, if the thought of being in prison makes him piss his pants he shouldn’t have committed a murder.”   
Jongin’s jaw dropped, “b-but if he’s mentally unstable then-“

“Relax kid, we don’t know if he’s guilty yet. If he’s guilty there’s a possibility he’ll have to undergo several tests for mental illnesses, in the end he’ll probably end up in a mental institution of some sort. But despite you for some reason choosing to feel sorry for him even _if_ he admits to being guilty you need to remember that that means he killed someone, and murderers don’t deserve your pity.” His words shut Jongin up.

_“What do you mean you removed them from the house? They don’t belong to you! It’s my brother’s birthday next week I bought his gift already you can’t take him away from me!”_

Kyungsoo’s voice could be heard again, his screams were so vivid they didn’t even sound human; Jongin felt his entire body trembling. They were slow dancing what seemed like just moments ago; right now one of them would most likely be sentenced with manslaughter. He didn’t know it was possible to feel this uncomfortable.

“You’re free to leave now,” the police officer sighed, “my senses tell me you’ve given us all information you’re able to give. Thank you for helping us with this case. Take care.”

 

Jongin didn’t need confirmation from any authorities to know that Kyungsoo had to be the killer behind the murderers. When he and his mother came home from the police station there were still a crowd of policemen, paramedics, and journalists in front of Kyungsoo’s house, many of them were interested in a comment from Jongin or his mother too, but as much as he wanted to tell the world to not hate Kyungsoo he couldn’t get himself to utter a word. “Leave us alone,” his mother said instead.

He went straight to bed but was unable to sleep, he regretted not exchanging phone numbers with Kyungsoo, not because it would’ve helped him much now anyway, if Kyungsoo was still at the police station busy admitting to killing his family he probably didn’t have time for texting.

He tried to call Baekhyun instead but didn’t get a reply, it was late too and Baekhyun had had a rough day already, chances were he didn’t need to talk more about the traumatising events he’d been through.

As if the rest wasn’t enough, Jongin’s bed obviously still smelled faintly like Kyungsoo, it made him want to cry yet no tears made their way down his cheeks; he’d probably used them all already.

 

It was all over the news the next day, people in the village wouldn’t shut up about it. Jongin couldn’t really pinpoint if it was because they cared for Kyungsoo or because they were excited about the small town finally getting nationwide attention. It was undoubtedly the latter and it made him angry.

His father suggested moving back to Seoul again, “it might help you… you know, forget it all,” he’d said to Jongin the next morning, he’d skipped school for obvious reasons and didn’t fancy talking to anyone about yesterday’s events.

“It won’t help me at all.” He muttered through gritted teeth, the image of Kyungsoo’s mother’s corpse was stuck in his brain and not even moving to Antarctica could make him forget, “it’s no use.”

“Should we get an appointment with a therapist? I think it would be good for you,” his father looked up from his newspaper, “I’m serious Jongin, you could tell me to do anything and I’d do it if it made you feel better.”

Jongin turned around to face the wall instead, “I don’t know dad, just let me be.”

“If that’s what you want that’s what I’ll do. You know where to find me if you need something.”

As soon as his father left the kitchen Jongin caught himself shivering as he looked out of the window and saw Kyungsoo’s house in the distance.

His phone buzzed and revealed a text from an unknown number: 

 _‘Say happy birthday to Seungsoo from me and tell my mum that I’m sorry_.’


	6. On-Going (Epilogue)

_“Why did you do it?” The man’s voice was stern and deep, it vaguely reminded Kyungsoo of his father, but only vaguely._

_He couldn’t give an answer without losing his mind completely in the process, so he kept quiet._

_“You aren’t obligated to reply, but it’d help us a lot, I think it’d help you too.” The man, whose name Kyungsoo couldn’t remember, tried to flash a smile; it didn’t come out very genuine._

_“I told you I didn’t mean to do it,” their eye contact only lasted for a few seconds before Kyungsoo had to look away, “it’s just that she kept, she just kept being like that and I lost control. If you’d left me with her we could’ve solved it.”_

_It took roughly a minute for the man to say something, “she kept being like what? We need you to elaborate or else we can’t use what you’re telling us for anything.”_

_“She never let me do anything, I was stuck in the house twenty-four seven, seven days a week, twelve months a year. She never came home until 4 AM in the morning so the house always looked like shit, she told us it was because she worked two jobs in order to support us, Seungsoo believed her and did all the housework.”_

_“You didn’t believe her?”_

_Kyungsoo scoffed, “if she was working two jobs we would’ve had more money. I found a book in her room where she’d written down phone numbers for at least forty different men. She didn’t come home until late at night because she was sleeping around, she didn’t even take money for it, if she did she used it on something material for herself, not on something that could help us renovate the house.”_

_The man nodded, as if he somehow understood what Kyungsoo was saying, it was obvious that he didn’t understand anything, “all of this angered you?”_

_“Of course it did! She was never home because she was out partying all night, rejecting her children completely! Seungsoo tried so hard to do well in school, clean the house, and cook for us at the same time. You saw the house, you know how decrepit it was, why do you think I was able to kick in the door?” His voice was louder than it should be, he was on the edge of screaming, memories of his brother barely sleeping at night still fresh in his mind, “I hated her, one day I couldn’t take it anymore, it wasn’t my intention.” His voice cracked, “we could’ve solved it, but she wouldn’t listen.” He was never the type to cry, so when fresh tears started falling down his cheeks he immediately lowered his head so the man wouldn’t see it._

_“So you killed her.”_

_“I didn’t mean to do it, I’ve tried so hard to make up for the mistakes by being nice to them the last month-“_

_“Even though they’re dead?”_

_“I told you it wasn’t my intention!”_

_The man hid his face in his hands, “sure. Care to tell me why you killed your brother as well?”_

_It was something he’d hoped he wouldn’t have to tell anyone about, “he guilt-tripped me, I swear I wouldn’t have done it if he hadn’t given me that stupid look. Even after,” Kyungsoo took a deep breath and shook his head, “even after I did it he continued to look at me that way, so I put him to sleep in his bed so he wouldn’t make me go crazy.”_

_“Listen boy I’m sorry but it sounded like you went crazy way before he guilt-tripped you.”_

_The comment stung in Kyungsoo’s chest, “I tried to make up for it, I really did.”_

_“There’s nothing left for me to ask you, a psychologist will ask you more questions in order to give a proper diagnosis. I truly believe that you’re not a monster, I hope you know that.” The man got up from his chair and left the room with a pitying expression on his face._

 

Jongin looked up from his daze as someone sat down on the swing next to him, “hey,” he was met by Baekhyun’s face, this time a lot less cheerful than it used to be.

“Hey.” He wasn’t really in the mood for talking, but Baekhyun didn’t seem to care much about that, he’d never cared much for what other people thought anyway.

The other boy kicked a small rock with his foot, “I still see them at night.” He didn’t need to tell Jongin who he meant by ‘them’, it was obvious enough as it was.

“I only dream of Kyungsoo, it’s as if my brain can’t process the fact that he killed them.” In all honesty Jongin hadn’t dreamed much of Kyungsoo, mainly since he hadn’t dreamed much at all, but when he did it was about his neighbour.

Baekhyun nodded, “I put a flower on his desk in our classroom, I know he’s not dead but he won’t return so the situation is somewhat similar. Except that this is less sad and more terrifying.”

“I think it’s sad.”

He didn’t get a reply, instead Baekhyun started laughing quietly, it was a weird situation for both of them. Perhaps Baekhyun’s only way of comprehending it all was to laugh at it. “We’re moving,” he finally said, “my mum doesn’t think it’s good for me here.”

“Let’s go inside, it’s cold,” Jongin didn’t want to talk about it any longer, it didn’t help any of them, “they’re going to tear down his house so we’re staying here, when the house’s gone the memories will hopefully be a well.”

Baekhyun gave him a sad smile, “I doubt it. Did you know that some people are saying his family members committed suicide and that Kyungsoo’s only saying he’s guilty because he’s mentally unstable or something?”

It would’ve been nice if that was the truth, but Jongin knew it couldn’t be, “the police said they were choked to death.”

“They could’ve choked each other?” Baekhyun looked a bit too hopeful for Jongin’s liking.

“I think you need to accept what happened, come on, let’s go inside.”

 

The funeral was private and Jongin wasn’t invited. Apparently Kyungsoo’s mother had a sister willing to pay for the entire thing. Who actually went as guests remained a mystery.

Around a week after the bodies were buried Jongin, Sehun, Zitao, and Baekhyun went by themselves instead, “it’s so odd,” Sehun muttered, his voice so silent it probably wasn’t heard by anyone but Jongin, “I visited them once, I already told you that, Seungsoo seemed so nice, he really cared for Kyungsoo.”

Jongin held a birthday card in his hands, Kyungsoo had asked for him to say happy birthday to his brother, and even though this probably wasn’t what his neighbour had had in mind, it was the only thing Jongin could do, “it’s not like we can do anything about it.”

“You say it as if it’s something you get over in a matter of days, one of our classmates killed his own family,” Zitao retorted.

“And he admitted to doing so, didn’t even try to deny it,” Sehun added.

Jongin knew they were right, it was probably just a matter of dealing with the trauma, “I know, it horrifies me too.”

They all stood in silence for what felt like forever, “we should go home,” Baekhyun finally stated, “I still need to pack a few things before we move.”


End file.
